Pain and Suffering

I'm a pretty sceptical human being. When I hear stories about dead rats in salads or abandoned babies found on the side of the road, I almost always wonder if the person doing the "finding" is actually a perpetrator in the incident. In the case of the Haley family I seriously doubt it, and when a true wrong has been committed it becomes time for big business to pay up big time. I think there is something to be said for pain and suffering. I think it is real and I think it needs to be dealt with.

Hold on a second before you say anything. I don't mean the pain and suffering of the person with the negative experience. Although I don't doubt that it is terrible when your hands are scalded by hot coffee or your stomach is turned by a dead rat. No, I'm talking about the pain and suffering of the corporation. In many cases the only thing that will get a company to pay attention is to pay up.

I especially have little sympathy for places like restaurants that fail to live up to their end of the social contract. Of course everyone is entitled to get what they pay for. You buy a stereo with your hard earned dollars and you deserve to get something that works. The last piece of electronics I bought came broken. You can imagine my displeasure. But restaurants are the most important. Because there is (like I said before) a social contract with society. Is there anything we do as human beings that is more vulnerable to our personal well-being than to consume food prepared by someone else? Kings had attendants for the sole purpose of taking bites of their food to determine if it was poisoned. Not only do we invest a tremendous amount of trust in eating establishments but we pay them for it. Granted we are paying for the meal but we are also paying for the peace of mind that a reputable restaurant is providing us with a safe meal. Is that too much to ask? I think not. It's not like we are asking the fast food industry to keep the peace in Iraq. Nor are we expecting them to land a manned space probe on the Moon. It's food service for God's sake! If you have to invest more money in health and sanitation than do that and stop spending money on children's toys.

Keep in mind, I realize that certain fast food chains pretty much represent the "ass-end" of the culinary spectrum. I myself haven't eaten at certain places in over two years because basically the food sucks. But it is still supposed to be food, not a pet cemetery. So dig deep I say. Swing for the fences and force those multi-national conglomerates to pay up big. Why should big oil be the only company to be perceived as an evil empire in this country?

It's all about the percentages.

The show Deal or No Deal has swept the nation over the last few months. When I first heard about it I was not impressed. Apparently the new and improved millennium version of Howie Mandell hosts the show where contestants pick one of 26 cases with a specific amount inside, ranging from one penny to one million dollars. The contestant is then asked to reveal the remaining cases in stages. Each stage the contestant (and the mysterious banker who lives in a shadowy booth overlooking the game-show) is left to speculate how much money is in their own case. The banker periodically offers up a cash exchange for the still "unknown" amount in their case. The contestant must either accept or decline "The Deal."

Pardon the pun but "big deal!" Who cares? It's a game of chance and not skill. At least in Who Wants To Be A Millionaire you have to demonstrate some sort of knowledge. I've surfed by the show many times and NEVER felt compelled to stop. For some reason I decided to see what all the fuss was about the other night and I stopped to watch for a few minutes. I'm here to say that I was wrong. This show is worth watching for three reasons.

One: It's all about the percentages. I thought there was no skill involved. There is actually a modicum of skill required. Unfortunately it's some pretty complex math. When the banker makes an offer to the contestant to buy the case, it is based on the mathematical probability that the case the contestant "owns" has more or less in it than the offer. As far as I have seen no contestant has attempted to do the math to determine if the offer being made is the mathematical best deal to take. All they do is go with their gut and continue to go forward until the banker makes a deal that just "feels good" to them. Which leads me to the second reason why this show is worth watching.

Two: The contestants are so wheels off crazy it is as close to watching a reality TV show train wreck without watching a reality TV show. I haven't seen much of this show, but what I have seen is ridiculous. Some of these contestants strut around the stage like they are staring in their own movie. Like they have waited their entire lives to be on TV and this is their moment to impress everybody with their boisterous personality. Vomit! Still, it's great watching their bravado get squashed when the banker starts offering them less and less money because they chose to keep moving forward with opening cases when they should have stopped while they were ahead.

Three: Check out the website and see for yourself.

Deal or No Deal

Victory!

Victory is ours! The Q and I finally had a solid win this week for our fantasy football team. For those of you that don't know the Q and I combined forces to form the greatest rock and roll fantasy football franchise that ever rocked this side of the Mississippi River! Unfortuantely the gods of rock and fantasy football have not been smiling upon our humble franchise. We have eeked out two wins in embarassing fashion and have been dragging the bottom of the league standings. However, we both knew we had a great team. They have just been late bloomers. With a few free agent acquisitions and some of our drafted players finally coming on strong we decimated the division leader 59-52 (so far) and we have 3 more players yet to play. That should equate to at least a 69-52 victory!

I think the world will look back on this week of October in 2006 and remember that this was the momment that the Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet finally made its run for the play-offs!

For those of you paying attention...

I started my new job last week. And for those of you that care I give the new situation an A- on the report card. Everyone I have met is very nice. The entire atmosphere is far more friendly and welcoming. Everything I have seen so far seams to indicate that resources will be plentiful, the work load will be distributed well, and that my support staff will actually support me which was a complete crock of shit with my last employer.

But it is a large organization. The largest I have ever worked in and there are inevitably some logistical and communication issues associated with it. This however is the least of my worries and probably one of the easier things to fix.

Of course this is all very knee-jerk since I am still in my first week (which is largely just orientation), I will not meet my boss until November (he was hired after me), and I have no sense of how maxed out the management pushes the staff work-load. Call me a high-S on the D.I.S.C. assessment but I am not quick to trust and I can be be very skeptical of peoples motives. So I am reserving judgment for a little further down the road. In the meantime I am Mr. Positive Thinking Man and hopeful that this is someplace I can spend the next 5-7 years... or more.

So going from a D- in job situation to an A- is pretty good.

The Doctor Is In!

Several months ago I did an early review of the new "Who" series. Typically I give shows 5 to 6 episodes before giving up on them completely. Sci-Fi/Fantasy programing gets an even longer leash from me. Sometimes as much as two whole seasons. For Doctor Who I might have given the series three whole seasons before giving up. I am happy to say that it is no longer necessary to take the "wait and see" attitude. The new Doctor Who series is freakin' fantastic!

I have to say that it was touch and go there at first. Eccelston really didn't do it for me. I enjoyed the stories... somewhat (although the pacing still felt rushed). I thought Billie Piper had been great as the sidekick and the guest cast had been excellent. Still something about it didn't feel right. It was as if the Doctor was too cool. Almost too hip with his studly leather jacket and rugged good looks. In the past The Doctor was almost always in control of the situation but he at least gave us a thrill ride because the actor playing the part always attacked the role with a genuine seriousness making the jeapordy feel more real. Eccelston played the confident Doctor well. Almost too well. Sure, he would occasionally act the fool or give the camera a wide-eyed gawking stare. But for the most part he strolled through the scenes like the jock quarterback in the school play who was only their because his cheerleader girlfriend insisted he play opposite her in Romeo and Juliet. I was seriously beginning to worry that the direction of popular culture had forever turned The Doctor into Han Solo. Luckily the first Dalek story came along about half-way through season one. It was strong and potentially the best of the first season. The finale was equally enjoyable and also happened to feature the Daleks again.

But stop the freaking presses! David Tennant as the Doctor in season 2 has been outstanding. The pacing of the stories (in my opinion) has improved (or perhaps I am just getting used to the one-hour format. In all honesty, the shinning part of the new season is Tennant. He fits the bill for the Doctor perfectly. He is the right balance of hero and galactic renegade. He has the perfect mix of English gentleman and bizarre alien attributes. And he gives each scene a frenetic twist that sends a message to the audience that the situation may be in hand but it is far from safe! I can't say enough good things about this actors portrayal. The original series will always hold a very dear place in my heart and few of the new episodes will ever outshine the best of the classic series but season 2 is proving to be packed with great stories and Tennant may very well rank as my third favorite Doctor placing just behind Tom Baker and Peter Davidson.

So welcome to a permanent spot on my TiVo, Doctor. I am so very proud of your return!

Manhood: Confirmed!

My wife and I went to the hospital last week for the big sonogram that usually will tell parents the gender of the baby you are expecting. I am happy to say that my manhood has been confirmed twice over now as we will be having another boy! I guess I just can't help but produce male offspring. I think I would have been a great 16th century tyrant. Heirs to the throne. Generals for my armies! Yes, I am truly a man-extraordinaire!

In all seriousness, my wife and I were only praying for a healthy baby. We would have enjoyed raising a little girl, but we will equally enjoy raising another little boy. The important thing is the pregnancy appears to be progressing normally and that the baby falls in the "standard" for all measurements related to its development. For this I am truly grateful.

Even better... For the immediate future: The re-use of baby clothes and toys. For the distant future: No weddings to pay-for or horny boy friends chasing after my daughter. So all in all... life is good. Pass the turkey leg and the broadsword.

The Wheel is closed for repairs

We will be back in a week once a few dust bunnies have been cleared and the garage sale has concluded.