It's been almost a year since my last post and that is just a crime. Much has happened in my life since May of 2010 including a new job in a new town. So I've got that going for me. But what do we all love most here at The Wheel in Space? That's right. Everyone wants to know what Cyber D thinks about television. I've got some great new stuff on the TiVo these days and some old favorites. So here is what Cyber D is watching right now.
Justified - Great show in its 2nd season. You like hot red-neck chicks, crazy meth addicts from Kentucky, and a bad ass U.S. Marshall that shoots first and doesn't even bother to ask questions later? Watch Justified.
Smallville - This show has gotten really old and really tired. But they say it's the final season so I've tuned back in to see Tom Welling finally done those red and blue tights in the finale.
The League - Okay so I'm not watching The League right now since it is only showing new episodes in the fall but watching this in rerun is worth it. It is - hands down - the funniest show in TV right now.
Perfect Couples - You'd think this was a chick flick by the name of the show but you'd be surprised how much stuff is in this show for guys.
Star Wars: The Clone Wars - There really aren't any good sci-fi shows on TV right now. I think the fad may be drawing to a close. We may not see much sci-fi over the next decade. In the meantime, scratch that fan-boy itch by watching these guys write some seriously wild retroactive continuity.
Archer - I haven't actually started watching this show yet but I am damn close. The commercials are hilarious. Plus I like bad ass spies with no ability to self reflect.
Castle - This is the most main stream of the bunch but I like the Kate Beckett character and I'm always a fan of supporting the career of Nathan Fillon.
Phineas and Ferb - My kids love this show and its actually pretty funny. Plus those child voice actors an sing some serious funky music.
Showing posts with label Lists. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lists. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 08, 2011
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Top 5 Greatest Movies You've Never Seen
I saw The Wrestler last month. If you've seen it you should agree with me that it was most awesome. I hadn't seen Mickey Rorke in anything good since... well, I hadn't seen him in anything since I last rented Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man. Now that movie kicked serious bootie. And that got me thinking about some great movies that you've never seen. So let's begin.
5) Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man
You know those action movies with the straight laced hero and his wild and crazy hero friend? That's not this movie. Take out the bland hero and replace him with another wild-ass, butt kickin', crazy in the head alcoholic who is fighting to save one man's daughter against a band of rabid drug lords who have no idea who they're messing with and you have this rockin' 80's movie gone wild!
4) Face/Off
This is a movie with one of the most ludicrous premises I've ever heard of and I love it. It really is a guilty pleasure at the top of my list along with Maria Carey and Sour Patch Kids. You know that movie about the never say die police hero up against the crazy terrorist? That's not this movie. But if you take those two characters and surgically swap their faces along with relative body hair and vocal chords and then plop them into each other's respective worlds then you have one of the most guns-blazing, window shattering, compound-bone-fracturing, movies of its time.
3) Rosencrance and Gildenstern are Dead
You know that movie about two dumb ass retards that travel the countryside getting into all sorts of ridiculous trouble? No, not Dumb and Dumber... well kind of. This is if Shakespeare wrote Dumb and Dumber, and it's a damn fine flick. With Gary Oldman and Tim Roth playing the title characters you get two of the most dark and twistedly talented actors playing against type and making high English writing actually sound funny. Rent this!
2) Diggstown
You know that movie about the con man who changes his ways after falling in love in small town America. Take that movie and throw in a vicious rural tycoon, a very young and up and coming Heather Graham, and more double crosses than a twizzler and you have this movie. That and Louis Gossett Junior kicks ass.
1) Fandango
There really isn't a comparison for this film. As best I can say it's the first Bro-Mance before there was such a thing. As funny as The Hangover is... this is better. Plus it's probably the only Kevin Costner movie worth a damn. It's at the top of my list, isn't that enough for you to rent it?
Merry Christmas!
5) Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man
You know those action movies with the straight laced hero and his wild and crazy hero friend? That's not this movie. Take out the bland hero and replace him with another wild-ass, butt kickin', crazy in the head alcoholic who is fighting to save one man's daughter against a band of rabid drug lords who have no idea who they're messing with and you have this rockin' 80's movie gone wild!
4) Face/Off
This is a movie with one of the most ludicrous premises I've ever heard of and I love it. It really is a guilty pleasure at the top of my list along with Maria Carey and Sour Patch Kids. You know that movie about the never say die police hero up against the crazy terrorist? That's not this movie. But if you take those two characters and surgically swap their faces along with relative body hair and vocal chords and then plop them into each other's respective worlds then you have one of the most guns-blazing, window shattering, compound-bone-fracturing, movies of its time.
3) Rosencrance and Gildenstern are Dead
You know that movie about two dumb ass retards that travel the countryside getting into all sorts of ridiculous trouble? No, not Dumb and Dumber... well kind of. This is if Shakespeare wrote Dumb and Dumber, and it's a damn fine flick. With Gary Oldman and Tim Roth playing the title characters you get two of the most dark and twistedly talented actors playing against type and making high English writing actually sound funny. Rent this!
2) Diggstown
You know that movie about the con man who changes his ways after falling in love in small town America. Take that movie and throw in a vicious rural tycoon, a very young and up and coming Heather Graham, and more double crosses than a twizzler and you have this movie. That and Louis Gossett Junior kicks ass.
1) Fandango
There really isn't a comparison for this film. As best I can say it's the first Bro-Mance before there was such a thing. As funny as The Hangover is... this is better. Plus it's probably the only Kevin Costner movie worth a damn. It's at the top of my list, isn't that enough for you to rent it?
Merry Christmas!
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Talent or Doo-Doo Pants?
I was talking to Gyuss on the phone the other day and we were commenting on the greatness of the movie Fandango. You can go to The Cave of Gyuss to see a few clips from this masterpiece. On a related note we were speculating if Kevin Costner had even five movies to his credit that would fall into the category of greatness. Even more specifically does he have even one good movie to his credit where he is the singular hero (and not simply a single piece of a larger ensemble cast).
So I now submit to you facts:
The top 5 Costner movies that are considered good but Costner's still crap
5. Tin Cup - There are a few guys that like this movie because they think it's about golf. They could not be more wrong. What it's really about is Kevin's terrible hair-piece and how many times he can say "golly-shucks" with his eyes to Rene Russo.
4. Waterworld - Arguably the only sci-fi credit to his name. This had lots of action, explosions, and Denis Hopper. Well... two out of three ain't bad I suppose, but this dud's worldwide gross barely covered production costs.
3. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves - Two words: Accent Coach! Could the man not even try to have an English accent? By this time Costner was in his prime and really mailing it in. What a douche! The only reason this movie has any legs at all is because of the greatness of Alan Rickman.
2. The Bodyguard - Talk about a meteoric rise of one of the greatest singers in pop-music history. At the height of Whitney's popularity this movie burst onto the scene grossing more than $400 million world wide. I think we can all agree that Witney is the first, last, and only reason this movie is half-way good.
1. Dances with Wolves - Winner of 7 Oscars, one being best picture. Costner plays the single solitary lead about an epic tale of write and wrong in the American west. What is there not to love? How about that glaring error in the film when three birds flying over head are identified as geese when in reality there were cranes? What a continuity disaster!
The REAL top 5 Costner movies
5. Bull Durham - Perhaps one of the best baseball movies ever made. While Coster's role is arguably the lead, he still plays more of an ensemble character to the larger story. Great film but not just because of him.
4. The Untouchables - Perhaps one of the best mafia/cop movies ever made. Coster's role is sound but again, he's just one piece of an ensemble cast that includes Sean freakin' Connery.
3. Silverado - Perhaps one of the best cowboy movies ever made. Coster's role is great but he plays the smallest part of a very formidable ensemble cast.
2. Fandango - Perhaps one of the best college buddy movies ever made. Coster's role is one of the best in his career but still only an ensemble role.
1. Field of Dreams - Perhaps THE best baseball movie ever made. And Coster stands alone as the show's focal point and hero. Way to go, Kev!
There you have it, folks. If the measure of greatness is a single piece of work than Coster is up there with the greats, plus he has a few decent films where he plays a critical ensemble role. But time would indicate that this actor does not get better with age... in fact he may be spoiling over time.
Cyber D's Bottom Line: Costner is a Doo-Doo Pants actor.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Everybody Loves Lists!
In my last post a question was recently asked regarding what (if any) movie franchises should be considered "great" from start to finish. As I am a shameful lover of lists, I am taking it upon myself to provide the definitive answer to this question.
First off: I think it needs to be pointed out that very few franchises achieve greatness throughout the entirety of its volumes. For example, the first two Superman movies are greatness but the other sequels make the overall franchise a dud. The same goes for the Batman, X-Men, Die Hard, and The Matrix films... especially The Matrix. The first was genius, the rest were garbage. I think Spiderman was close to achieving greatness but the last film was just a disappointment.
I think the one caveat to this rule is if a franchise has a huge gap in time between productions. The newly imagined Batman franchise can stand alone and has a new opportunity to achieve greatness since the latest film rocked. Additionally, if you apply the same rule to the Star Wars franchise, the first three films qualify for the cinematic trilogy hall of fame. Finally, I think attention must be given to continuity. Nothing is more annoying than when plot continuity is ignored or casting changes are made willy-nilly! While it is no ones fault that Dumbledore had to be re-cast, it only hurts the Harry Potter franchise's chance at greatness.
My Top 5 in order from good to great...
5) The Bill and Ted Trilogy Anthology
4) A Fistfull of Dollars - A Few Dollars More - The Good The Bad, and The Ugly
3) Indiana Jones Trilogy
2) Star Wars Episodes 4-6
1) Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Please feel free to include your favorite two-parters, trilogies, septologies, and the like in comments.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
My Top 3 Songs of All Time
A final throw-back article from the old DUI.com. A little look back into the nostaglia of a young man's life and how music played its part.
1. You Shook Me All Night Long
AC/DC
There is a time in every young mans life when the exhilaration of freedom is bestowed upon him. A day where nothing in the world matters more than the independence one feels when the officer of the state awards him the single most important document in the history of civilized society: the drivers license. Everyone has their own special memory of that time in their life. Mine is inextricably intertwined with the greatest AC/DC song of all time. There are few things that capture the youthful exuberance of being sixteen and behind the wheel of your first car. Flying down the highway, doing twice the legal speed limit, with the windows down, and the radio up, listening to your favorite song. The song that made being behind the wheel more than just a drive. For me that song was You Shook Me All Night Long. Between the sledgehammer poetry of the lyrics and the sheer artistry of the electric guitar, nobody can ever come close to capturing the raw energy of AC/DC’s greatest hit. The notable predictability of the drums is even forgiven when listening to this all time great. Every man has felt the thrill that only his favorite driving song has to offer. Every man longs to capture the spirit of that moment again. All I have to do is pull out the Who Made Who album and hit track number two.
2. What It Takes
Aerosmith
When ranking the greatest songs of all time it is inevitable that I return to my high school years in the search. There is no other time when music matters more. It ranks at the very top of every man’s list along with cars, women, and sports. Okay, so these things remain pretty important throughout a man’s life but never again is so much time dedicated to these four endeavors. How many times did I spend with the guys cruising around town after the football game looking for that elusive girl in the mustang convertible on a Friday night? Far too many to remember. The score of the game, the name of the girl, the make of my best friends car all escape me now. But I do remember the songs. The songs that we listened to over and over again are the ones that stick. The songs that, to this day, I stop whatever I’m doing and sing along at the top of my lungs. There are few albums that have received as much play on my stereo as Aerosmith’s Pump album and the best song on the album is What It Takes. It is a powerful ballad that showcases the talents of the entire band. The pitched singing of Steven Tyler, the confidence of Joe Perry, all are at their best in this all time classic. It captures the spirit of angst in a relationship gone awry. It speaks to the very hart of unrequited love and epitomizes the best of rock and roll. So next time as you flip through the CD racks and all you can remember from the late 80’s is bad hair band metal. I encourage you to pick up a copy of Aerosmith’s song What It Takes and reintroduce yourself to the best that rock and roll has to offer.
3. Ants Marching
Dave Mathews Band
Everyone has a story about being a fan of a band’s music before that band hit the big time. Most of those people are lying through their teeth. There are very few who can claim that they listened to The Dave Mathews Band when they were playing college campuses across the east coast. Unfortunately I am not one of those lucky few. Fortunately, a good friend of mine was and he put me on to The Dave Mathews Band during the summer after our first year in college. So I am proud to say that I was on the cusp of The Dave Mathews Band mega fan base. I was lucky enough to see them live at a “standing room only” concert in Dallas, Texas. It was their first major tour for their album Under the Table and Dreaming. They performed my favorite song that night, Ants Marching. It had been revised from my first hearing of it that summer prior to the concert. My friend owned the hard to find Remember Two Things album. Back then you were lucky to find Dave Mathews on the shelves at all. Hunting for the original version of Ants Marching was for me the Holy Grail of song searches. I eventually found the album in a Los Angeles record store the following summer, a few months before the album could be found in every Wal-Mart across the country. Ants Marching from Remember Two Things was and still is worth going half way across the United States to find. The Dave Mathews Band is the modern day bard, commenting on society through a masterful performance by every player. Carter Beauford’s performance is a kaleidoscope of dizzying percussion. Leroi Moore handles the Saxophone with smooth style only matched on the streets of New Orleans. Stefan Lessard hammers away on the bass like the big band musicians of the twenties did on the cello. If you haven’t seen the violin played like an electric guitar than you haven’t seen the talent that is Boyd Tinsley. Last but not least the guitar and vocal talents of Dave Mathews himself round out the excellence and uniqueness of their single best song. If you haven’t heard Ants Marching from Remember Two Things then you haven’t heard Ants Marching.
1. You Shook Me All Night Long
AC/DC
There is a time in every young mans life when the exhilaration of freedom is bestowed upon him. A day where nothing in the world matters more than the independence one feels when the officer of the state awards him the single most important document in the history of civilized society: the drivers license. Everyone has their own special memory of that time in their life. Mine is inextricably intertwined with the greatest AC/DC song of all time. There are few things that capture the youthful exuberance of being sixteen and behind the wheel of your first car. Flying down the highway, doing twice the legal speed limit, with the windows down, and the radio up, listening to your favorite song. The song that made being behind the wheel more than just a drive. For me that song was You Shook Me All Night Long. Between the sledgehammer poetry of the lyrics and the sheer artistry of the electric guitar, nobody can ever come close to capturing the raw energy of AC/DC’s greatest hit. The notable predictability of the drums is even forgiven when listening to this all time great. Every man has felt the thrill that only his favorite driving song has to offer. Every man longs to capture the spirit of that moment again. All I have to do is pull out the Who Made Who album and hit track number two.
2. What It Takes
Aerosmith
When ranking the greatest songs of all time it is inevitable that I return to my high school years in the search. There is no other time when music matters more. It ranks at the very top of every man’s list along with cars, women, and sports. Okay, so these things remain pretty important throughout a man’s life but never again is so much time dedicated to these four endeavors. How many times did I spend with the guys cruising around town after the football game looking for that elusive girl in the mustang convertible on a Friday night? Far too many to remember. The score of the game, the name of the girl, the make of my best friends car all escape me now. But I do remember the songs. The songs that we listened to over and over again are the ones that stick. The songs that, to this day, I stop whatever I’m doing and sing along at the top of my lungs. There are few albums that have received as much play on my stereo as Aerosmith’s Pump album and the best song on the album is What It Takes. It is a powerful ballad that showcases the talents of the entire band. The pitched singing of Steven Tyler, the confidence of Joe Perry, all are at their best in this all time classic. It captures the spirit of angst in a relationship gone awry. It speaks to the very hart of unrequited love and epitomizes the best of rock and roll. So next time as you flip through the CD racks and all you can remember from the late 80’s is bad hair band metal. I encourage you to pick up a copy of Aerosmith’s song What It Takes and reintroduce yourself to the best that rock and roll has to offer.
3. Ants Marching
Dave Mathews Band
Everyone has a story about being a fan of a band’s music before that band hit the big time. Most of those people are lying through their teeth. There are very few who can claim that they listened to The Dave Mathews Band when they were playing college campuses across the east coast. Unfortunately I am not one of those lucky few. Fortunately, a good friend of mine was and he put me on to The Dave Mathews Band during the summer after our first year in college. So I am proud to say that I was on the cusp of The Dave Mathews Band mega fan base. I was lucky enough to see them live at a “standing room only” concert in Dallas, Texas. It was their first major tour for their album Under the Table and Dreaming. They performed my favorite song that night, Ants Marching. It had been revised from my first hearing of it that summer prior to the concert. My friend owned the hard to find Remember Two Things album. Back then you were lucky to find Dave Mathews on the shelves at all. Hunting for the original version of Ants Marching was for me the Holy Grail of song searches. I eventually found the album in a Los Angeles record store the following summer, a few months before the album could be found in every Wal-Mart across the country. Ants Marching from Remember Two Things was and still is worth going half way across the United States to find. The Dave Mathews Band is the modern day bard, commenting on society through a masterful performance by every player. Carter Beauford’s performance is a kaleidoscope of dizzying percussion. Leroi Moore handles the Saxophone with smooth style only matched on the streets of New Orleans. Stefan Lessard hammers away on the bass like the big band musicians of the twenties did on the cello. If you haven’t seen the violin played like an electric guitar than you haven’t seen the talent that is Boyd Tinsley. Last but not least the guitar and vocal talents of Dave Mathews himself round out the excellence and uniqueness of their single best song. If you haven’t heard Ants Marching from Remember Two Things then you haven’t heard Ants Marching.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
The Top Seinfeld Guest Characters
You know you've been waiting for it. You've been asking yourself how long it was going to take me to release the definitive assessment of the best Seinfeld minor characters of all time. Everyone has their favorite major character: The wacky Kramer, the neurotic George, the self-important Elaine, and the smug Jerry. But some of the best comedy to come out of this series came from the fantastic minor characters that were so important to the show's overall story. It is my pleasure to finally bring to the masses your top ten - in reverse order.
10)Uncle Leo
Uncle Leo is the annoying old coot relative that we all have in our family. He always greets you with an over-zealous hug, he brags about his own children, and bores you with horror stories about dead family members or physical ailments. In many cases these characters are as annoying as they are intended to be but the talents of Len Lesser manage to make Uncle Leo annoying to Jerry but enjoyable to the viewer. Uncle Leo appeared in 15 episodes making him one of the top ten most frequented characters to the series.
9)Mr. Pitt
Mr. Pitt was Elaine's boss for two episodes in the sixth season. But his impact on the series included eight episodes. This eccentric millionaire is obsessed with the right pair of socks, eating Snickers bars with a knife and fork, and terrified of fountain pens. These idiosyncrasies (among others) made the character an unpredictable and zany side-show and was cause for much hardship on Elaine. One of the most notable moments for this character is when a bizarre string of circumstances (including a brush with some black shoe-polish) lead Mr. Pitt to making a stock-holders presentation while looking like Adolph Hitler while not even being aware of it.
8) The Soup Nazi
While the Soup Nazi only appears in two episodes (The Soup Nazi & The Finale) this character left an indelible mark on the psyche of Seinfeld fans everywhere. Like most great creations from this series, The Soup Nazi is bizarre and yet realistic in his own crazy way. And with just a dash of the outlandish, The Soup Nazi represents all that was great about the series in its prime. Everyone who loved the show remembers fondly the way in which each of the main characters reacted to the dictatorial style of the Soup Nazi, thinking he was immune to the need for customer relations because his soup was so unique. Until Elaine got hold of his recipes.
7) Sue Ellen Mischke
The O'Henry Candy Bar heiress made wearing undergarments as outer-garments fashionable. She is the perfect combination of terrible and beautiful. Elaine sees Sue Ellen as an intense rival, compelling Elaine to lash out in unpredictable ways. Her most notable moments in the series occur when she wears only a bra for a top, causing Kramer to crash his car. She also invites the main cast to India for her wedding, only to find out that Elaine and the groom had a relationship together in the past. Sue Ellen also makes an appearance in my personal favorite episode: The Bottle Deposit (Parts 1 and 2). In this pivotal scene, Sue Ellen tempts Elaine into bidding on JFK's golf clubs at a price she cannot afford.
6) Jackie Chiles
Arguably a comedic "jab" at the then famous Johnny Cochran, Jackie Chiles is the slick defense attorney always out to make a quick buck. If Kramer were drug addict than Jackie would have been his "pusher." Unlike most, Jackie always took Kramer seriously and would provide the legal support to any of Kramer's schemes that required it. Well spoken, well dressed, and always available to the ladies, Jackie was a slick used car salesman with a law degree. Most notable moments include assisting Kramer in law suits against a major coffee company, the Oh Henry candy bar company, and the tobacco industry. It is also testament to the acting chops of Phil Morris that he plays a central role in the Seinfeld series finale.
5) Estelle Costanza
No two characters better explain the ball of neurosis that is George Costanza. This over-baring, melodramatic, hot-headed mother is often times the source of her son's frustration with life. But at the same time Mrs. Costanza is an endearing character who, more often than not, is the voice of reason in episodes where she appears. Her most notable moments include being groped by Kramer to the disdain of her husband and her constant bickering with said husband. But perhaps more important than anything, Estelle is a central figure in the single most famous episode of the Seinfeld series. Estelle is the one to walk in on her son while he is abusing himself to a Glamour magazine. This family trauma later sparks the conversation between the main characters that leads to "The Contest."
4) J. Peterman
The owner and chief executive of the J. Peterman Catalog company, Jacopo Peterman is a world traveler and salesman of upscale clothing. Based on a real person, Peterman is a dashing yet eccentric man who is prone to verbal rabbit trails that take him down memory lane. Appearing in an astounding 21 episodes, Peterman has the distinction of being one of the most repeated characters in the show's history. Peterman represents what he perceives as the ideal in man: nobel, brave, well spoken, and not the least bit humble. Like most of the great secondary characters in the series, he starts off as a counter-point to just one of the main characters but eventually becomes intertwined with each over the course of the series. His most notable moments really come from his bizarre perspective on life.
Mr. Peterman: I'm afraid it's your urine, Elaine. You've tested positive for opium.
Elaine: [astonished] Opium?
Mr. Peterman: That's right. White Lotus. Yam-yam. Shanghai Sally.
3) David Puddy
The on-again-off-again boyfriend of Elaine who at first glance seams like your stereotypical man. Elaine is initially drawn to Puddy because he is tall, handsome, and works with his hands. At one point in the series she even decides to start dating him again simply because she needs a dresser moved in her house. But it is Puddy's intricate personality that makes him such a dynamic character and the reason for his 11 appearances in the series. Between being a closet germaphobe, his love of New Jersey Devil Ray Hockey, Arbys, and his religious conviction, Puddy proves to be more than just a "strong-man" character. Perhaps if a lesser actor had portrayed the role the Puddy character might never have been given the time to develop but Patrick Wharburton pulls off the delicate balance of macho exterior with a sensitive soul. Ultimately Puddy's departing moment encapsulates his time on the series when Elaine tells him not to wait for her after she is sentenced to jail. His response: "Okay."
2) Frank Coztanza
The Costanza patriarch is one of the single most funniest characters in the entire series. Like his wife, he is over-baring, melodramatic, and hot headed, making them a match made in heaven. Only their similarities create massive tension between the couple causing many a temporary break-up over the course of the series. Never fear, the eternal love they share always lead them back together. Where Frank edges out his wife on this list is his eccentricities. He is far more bizarre and ultimately one of the most entertaining secondary players. His most notable moments are his fear of cooking, despite his culinary prowess, his envy of Christmas and the ultimate holiday that he creates: Festivus, and his entrepreneur venture with Kramer, the "Bro" ... or was it the "Manzeere?"
1) Newman
This disgruntled postal worker was the ying to Jerry's yang, the Lex Luthor to his Superman, the Moriarty to his Sherlock Holmes. Appearing in almost twice as many episodes as any other single character, Newman came as close to being a regular cast member as you could get. Best friends to Kramer, enemy of Jerry, secret admirer of Elaine, and afterthought to George, Newman permeated every corner of the Seinfeld universe. Some of the greatest episodes included a pivotal role for the Newman character. The most notable moments included the bottle deposit scheme with Kramer, infecting Jerry's apartment with fleas, and convincing Jerry to help him improve his standing at the post office so that he might be considered for a transfer to Hawaii. It goes without saying that the talented skills of Wayne Knight were instrumental in bringing this character to life and making him the enemy we all love to hate.
10)Uncle Leo
Uncle Leo is the annoying old coot relative that we all have in our family. He always greets you with an over-zealous hug, he brags about his own children, and bores you with horror stories about dead family members or physical ailments. In many cases these characters are as annoying as they are intended to be but the talents of Len Lesser manage to make Uncle Leo annoying to Jerry but enjoyable to the viewer. Uncle Leo appeared in 15 episodes making him one of the top ten most frequented characters to the series.
9)Mr. Pitt
Mr. Pitt was Elaine's boss for two episodes in the sixth season. But his impact on the series included eight episodes. This eccentric millionaire is obsessed with the right pair of socks, eating Snickers bars with a knife and fork, and terrified of fountain pens. These idiosyncrasies (among others) made the character an unpredictable and zany side-show and was cause for much hardship on Elaine. One of the most notable moments for this character is when a bizarre string of circumstances (including a brush with some black shoe-polish) lead Mr. Pitt to making a stock-holders presentation while looking like Adolph Hitler while not even being aware of it.
8) The Soup Nazi
While the Soup Nazi only appears in two episodes (The Soup Nazi & The Finale) this character left an indelible mark on the psyche of Seinfeld fans everywhere. Like most great creations from this series, The Soup Nazi is bizarre and yet realistic in his own crazy way. And with just a dash of the outlandish, The Soup Nazi represents all that was great about the series in its prime. Everyone who loved the show remembers fondly the way in which each of the main characters reacted to the dictatorial style of the Soup Nazi, thinking he was immune to the need for customer relations because his soup was so unique. Until Elaine got hold of his recipes.
7) Sue Ellen Mischke
The O'Henry Candy Bar heiress made wearing undergarments as outer-garments fashionable. She is the perfect combination of terrible and beautiful. Elaine sees Sue Ellen as an intense rival, compelling Elaine to lash out in unpredictable ways. Her most notable moments in the series occur when she wears only a bra for a top, causing Kramer to crash his car. She also invites the main cast to India for her wedding, only to find out that Elaine and the groom had a relationship together in the past. Sue Ellen also makes an appearance in my personal favorite episode: The Bottle Deposit (Parts 1 and 2). In this pivotal scene, Sue Ellen tempts Elaine into bidding on JFK's golf clubs at a price she cannot afford.
6) Jackie Chiles
Arguably a comedic "jab" at the then famous Johnny Cochran, Jackie Chiles is the slick defense attorney always out to make a quick buck. If Kramer were drug addict than Jackie would have been his "pusher." Unlike most, Jackie always took Kramer seriously and would provide the legal support to any of Kramer's schemes that required it. Well spoken, well dressed, and always available to the ladies, Jackie was a slick used car salesman with a law degree. Most notable moments include assisting Kramer in law suits against a major coffee company, the Oh Henry candy bar company, and the tobacco industry. It is also testament to the acting chops of Phil Morris that he plays a central role in the Seinfeld series finale.
5) Estelle Costanza
No two characters better explain the ball of neurosis that is George Costanza. This over-baring, melodramatic, hot-headed mother is often times the source of her son's frustration with life. But at the same time Mrs. Costanza is an endearing character who, more often than not, is the voice of reason in episodes where she appears. Her most notable moments include being groped by Kramer to the disdain of her husband and her constant bickering with said husband. But perhaps more important than anything, Estelle is a central figure in the single most famous episode of the Seinfeld series. Estelle is the one to walk in on her son while he is abusing himself to a Glamour magazine. This family trauma later sparks the conversation between the main characters that leads to "The Contest."
4) J. Peterman
The owner and chief executive of the J. Peterman Catalog company, Jacopo Peterman is a world traveler and salesman of upscale clothing. Based on a real person, Peterman is a dashing yet eccentric man who is prone to verbal rabbit trails that take him down memory lane. Appearing in an astounding 21 episodes, Peterman has the distinction of being one of the most repeated characters in the show's history. Peterman represents what he perceives as the ideal in man: nobel, brave, well spoken, and not the least bit humble. Like most of the great secondary characters in the series, he starts off as a counter-point to just one of the main characters but eventually becomes intertwined with each over the course of the series. His most notable moments really come from his bizarre perspective on life.
Mr. Peterman: I'm afraid it's your urine, Elaine. You've tested positive for opium.
Elaine: [astonished] Opium?
Mr. Peterman: That's right. White Lotus. Yam-yam. Shanghai Sally.
3) David Puddy
The on-again-off-again boyfriend of Elaine who at first glance seams like your stereotypical man. Elaine is initially drawn to Puddy because he is tall, handsome, and works with his hands. At one point in the series she even decides to start dating him again simply because she needs a dresser moved in her house. But it is Puddy's intricate personality that makes him such a dynamic character and the reason for his 11 appearances in the series. Between being a closet germaphobe, his love of New Jersey Devil Ray Hockey, Arbys, and his religious conviction, Puddy proves to be more than just a "strong-man" character. Perhaps if a lesser actor had portrayed the role the Puddy character might never have been given the time to develop but Patrick Wharburton pulls off the delicate balance of macho exterior with a sensitive soul. Ultimately Puddy's departing moment encapsulates his time on the series when Elaine tells him not to wait for her after she is sentenced to jail. His response: "Okay."
2) Frank Coztanza
The Costanza patriarch is one of the single most funniest characters in the entire series. Like his wife, he is over-baring, melodramatic, and hot headed, making them a match made in heaven. Only their similarities create massive tension between the couple causing many a temporary break-up over the course of the series. Never fear, the eternal love they share always lead them back together. Where Frank edges out his wife on this list is his eccentricities. He is far more bizarre and ultimately one of the most entertaining secondary players. His most notable moments are his fear of cooking, despite his culinary prowess, his envy of Christmas and the ultimate holiday that he creates: Festivus, and his entrepreneur venture with Kramer, the "Bro" ... or was it the "Manzeere?"
1) Newman
This disgruntled postal worker was the ying to Jerry's yang, the Lex Luthor to his Superman, the Moriarty to his Sherlock Holmes. Appearing in almost twice as many episodes as any other single character, Newman came as close to being a regular cast member as you could get. Best friends to Kramer, enemy of Jerry, secret admirer of Elaine, and afterthought to George, Newman permeated every corner of the Seinfeld universe. Some of the greatest episodes included a pivotal role for the Newman character. The most notable moments included the bottle deposit scheme with Kramer, infecting Jerry's apartment with fleas, and convincing Jerry to help him improve his standing at the post office so that he might be considered for a transfer to Hawaii. It goes without saying that the talented skills of Wayne Knight were instrumental in bringing this character to life and making him the enemy we all love to hate.
Sunday, July 16, 2006
Villains Part 3 of 3
Level 7: The Mad Genius (Mad Scientist)
The Mad Genius is a malevolent mastermind who delights in the demonstration of his massive intellect. He is often gifted in one or more of the arts and sciences and uses his gift to serve his own evil or selfish purposes. Unlike the Criminal Mastermind, this villain's purpose is not for the simple trinkets of wealth. In many cases they struggle to defy nature or God with their wicked plans. While the Mad Genius is mentally unhinged, the true threat lies in their unusual mental prowess, wrapped inside their twisted mind. The Mad Genius sees everyone as an intellectual inferior and they are all contemptible in his mind. He looks down on everyone around him and cannot abide anyone's achievement other than his own. In fact he will often develop an elaborate scheme to stop anyone that may stand in the way of his objective.
The Mad Scientist fills the ranks of this category with imposing villains like Scorpius from Farscape, The Invisible Man, and Davros from the Doctor Who story Genesis of the Daleks. But the Mad Genius is not always a man of science. Antonio Salieri from the movie Amadeus is arguably a musical genius but becomes obsessed with the destruction of the worlds greatest musical talent: Mozart. On a slightly more ridiculous note, Mr. Body from the movie Clue wields a genius so vast that the movie requires three different endings just to do his wicked scheming justice. In every case, the Mad Genius has twisted his gift into a dark weapon that he intends to use against humanity at any price.
Level 8: The Demigod
The Demigods of villainy are mortal men with extraordinary ability. They border on the mythological and often defy the laws of nature. Their evil is terrifying because they are seemingly an unstoppable force that wields mystical (or technological) ability so vast as to appear god-like to the innocent bystander. These Demigods motivation vary from character to character. Some are bored with their existence and conduct wicked deeds as nothing more than a casual distraction. Others are former villains from another level whose time as long since run out, but they cling to life through their unimaginable power with every action serving to defy their mortality. Some seek power and fortune like their villain brothers, only they operate on a level of power that is unmatched by 99% of the people around them.
It goes without saying that Emperor Palpatine from the Star Wars trilogy is the standard bearer of this archetype. His mastery of the darkside of the force is unmatched by all save Vader himself. Vader on the other hand is more of a Wayward Child who has fallen from the path. Another famous movie Demigod is General Zod from Superman II. Like his brethren, he wields near limitless power and crushes lesser beings effortlessly and with complete disregard for human life. In every case, the Demigod likens himself to a god, but still suffers the inevitable hubris which comes with such power. A hubris that eventually is his undoing.
Level 9: The Devil
This charming fiend is the root of all evils and we see his power in all of the previous eight levels of villainy. He is fanatical, monstrous, secretive, bloodthirsty, manipulative, tyrannical, artful, and powerful. But perhaps more than any other villain the Devil is a master of temptation. He gives people what they think they want, luring his victims into a spiraling decent of their own destruction. He can see into the very heart of others, caplitalizing on peoples darkest fears and most carnal desires. Once he has a victim walking the path of darkness he uses them as a pawn in his chess game to power. For it is absolute dominion over all things that the Devil desires and nothing less will suffice.
Few stories use this malevolent force as their villain and even fewer get it right. But there are some examples (both good and bad) that represent that deepest and darkest level of villainy. Saraun from The Lord of the Rings is possibly the best representation in television and film of our Devil archetype. His power is unmatched and his ring represents the greatest temptation any man must face and only the symbol of his power is capable of destroying the mighty demon-god. Another more "campy" version of our Devil is The Lord of Darkness from the film Legend. Outwardly this villain dresses the part and his power is nothing to slouch at either. There are others from the dramatic to the comedic but in every case you know the Devil by the antithesis of his being. He commits his evil deeds because our lies are his truth, our evil his goodness, our vice his virtue. He seeks our destruction because he is anti-life.
I hope you have enjoyed this tribute to the monsters who make our heroes into heroes. For as long as can be remembered mankind has enjoyed the tales of good versus evil. The struggle between man and beast. It is this struggle for redemption, honor, and love that makes our stories worth the journey.
The Mad Genius is a malevolent mastermind who delights in the demonstration of his massive intellect. He is often gifted in one or more of the arts and sciences and uses his gift to serve his own evil or selfish purposes. Unlike the Criminal Mastermind, this villain's purpose is not for the simple trinkets of wealth. In many cases they struggle to defy nature or God with their wicked plans. While the Mad Genius is mentally unhinged, the true threat lies in their unusual mental prowess, wrapped inside their twisted mind. The Mad Genius sees everyone as an intellectual inferior and they are all contemptible in his mind. He looks down on everyone around him and cannot abide anyone's achievement other than his own. In fact he will often develop an elaborate scheme to stop anyone that may stand in the way of his objective.
The Mad Scientist fills the ranks of this category with imposing villains like Scorpius from Farscape, The Invisible Man, and Davros from the Doctor Who story Genesis of the Daleks. But the Mad Genius is not always a man of science. Antonio Salieri from the movie Amadeus is arguably a musical genius but becomes obsessed with the destruction of the worlds greatest musical talent: Mozart. On a slightly more ridiculous note, Mr. Body from the movie Clue wields a genius so vast that the movie requires three different endings just to do his wicked scheming justice. In every case, the Mad Genius has twisted his gift into a dark weapon that he intends to use against humanity at any price.
Level 8: The Demigod
The Demigods of villainy are mortal men with extraordinary ability. They border on the mythological and often defy the laws of nature. Their evil is terrifying because they are seemingly an unstoppable force that wields mystical (or technological) ability so vast as to appear god-like to the innocent bystander. These Demigods motivation vary from character to character. Some are bored with their existence and conduct wicked deeds as nothing more than a casual distraction. Others are former villains from another level whose time as long since run out, but they cling to life through their unimaginable power with every action serving to defy their mortality. Some seek power and fortune like their villain brothers, only they operate on a level of power that is unmatched by 99% of the people around them.
It goes without saying that Emperor Palpatine from the Star Wars trilogy is the standard bearer of this archetype. His mastery of the darkside of the force is unmatched by all save Vader himself. Vader on the other hand is more of a Wayward Child who has fallen from the path. Another famous movie Demigod is General Zod from Superman II. Like his brethren, he wields near limitless power and crushes lesser beings effortlessly and with complete disregard for human life. In every case, the Demigod likens himself to a god, but still suffers the inevitable hubris which comes with such power. A hubris that eventually is his undoing.
Level 9: The Devil
This charming fiend is the root of all evils and we see his power in all of the previous eight levels of villainy. He is fanatical, monstrous, secretive, bloodthirsty, manipulative, tyrannical, artful, and powerful. But perhaps more than any other villain the Devil is a master of temptation. He gives people what they think they want, luring his victims into a spiraling decent of their own destruction. He can see into the very heart of others, caplitalizing on peoples darkest fears and most carnal desires. Once he has a victim walking the path of darkness he uses them as a pawn in his chess game to power. For it is absolute dominion over all things that the Devil desires and nothing less will suffice.
Few stories use this malevolent force as their villain and even fewer get it right. But there are some examples (both good and bad) that represent that deepest and darkest level of villainy. Saraun from The Lord of the Rings is possibly the best representation in television and film of our Devil archetype. His power is unmatched and his ring represents the greatest temptation any man must face and only the symbol of his power is capable of destroying the mighty demon-god. Another more "campy" version of our Devil is The Lord of Darkness from the film Legend. Outwardly this villain dresses the part and his power is nothing to slouch at either. There are others from the dramatic to the comedic but in every case you know the Devil by the antithesis of his being. He commits his evil deeds because our lies are his truth, our evil his goodness, our vice his virtue. He seeks our destruction because he is anti-life.
I hope you have enjoyed this tribute to the monsters who make our heroes into heroes. For as long as can be remembered mankind has enjoyed the tales of good versus evil. The struggle between man and beast. It is this struggle for redemption, honor, and love that makes our stories worth the journey.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Villains Part 2 of 3
Level 4: The Sociopath
Like the Wayward Child, the Sociopath exists in a similar delusional state that is marked by infantile feelings of personal omnipotence and grandeur. The primary difference is that the Sociopath needs no higher purpose to justify his actions. This savage predator enjoys cruelty simply because it is cruel. Their antisocial activity fuels itself because the violence and brutality they inflict on others IS the purpose for their existence. In many cases this villain is nothing more than a Monster villain with personality... and typically a bad personality at that. These bad-guys represent the most bloodthirsty of the bunch. Their pathological nature precludes rational thought and only serves to intensify their base desire to inflict suffering on others.
Most murder mystery villains fall in this category, along with a variety of horror villains and a smattering of action hero antagonists. We find these diabolical men and women in both classic and modern stories. The "Red-Leg" Captain, Terrill from The Outlaw Josey Wales is a perfect example of a low-life killer whose vicious behavior propels the action forward and marks the end of a great showdown between his character and Eastwood's portrayal of Josey Wales. Slightly less talkative but no more menacing is the murderous "Biker" from Raising Arizona. This movie villain is uniquely loathsome for the comedy genre and (as a result) generates a more rich stroy-line for an already great film. Last but not least are the twisted minds of the truly depraved such as the red-neck rapist known only as "Zed" in Pulp Fiction. There is perhaps no scene in Tarantino's film that is filled with more fear and menace than when Wallace and Butch suffer at the hands of Zed. In every case these villains represent a depraved creature, hell bent on destroying our heroes both psychologically and physically.
Level 5: The Criminal Mastermind
Delving even deeper into the levels of villainy we are introduced to one of the more diabolical archetypes in the pantheon. The Criminal Mastermind is as subversive and driven as the Wayward Child and as immune to morality as the demented sociopath. However, this villain is not encumbered with a religious or social dogma, nor is he blinded by mental anguish of psychological debilitation. No, this villain executes his plans with a cold and calculated precision that even your high-school chemistry teacher could appreciate. The criminal mastermind's intellect is vast and he uses this intellect as a weapon more deadly than any magic sword or buzzing-chainsaw. That is not to say that he is above the crude arts of torture and death.
It goes without saying that the famous Lex Luthor falls into this category as well as the cruel cunning of Hans Gruber from Die Hard. Their wickedness uses all the tools in the villain tool box including the threat of physical harm. Where these villains are limited is in the scope of their desires. As the title would suggest, they are not out to remake the world in their own image, nor are they hell bent on mankind's destruction. This villain is usually after a quick buck. The all mighty dollar drives this bad-guy. However, if a new world order or the genocide of mankind is the only way to his prize, they will gladly go there.
Level 6: The Tyrant
The Tyrant is an absolute ruler unrestrained by law or morals. He is an usurper of sovereignty. A ruler who exercises absolute power oppressively or brutally. In some cases the Tyrant can have two sides to his persona: The public philanthropist who is generous and sensitive to the political landscape and then the private demon who is a malevolent threat to all who cross his path. In other cases the Tyrant is an outward dictator from top to bottom, stepping on the necks of his citizens in order to create a utopia of his own design. In either case the Tyrant is a master of suppressing dissent and uses his power to maintain absolute control.
Examples of the Tyrant litter both film and television. One Tyrant that typifies these villains is Emperor Commodus from the award winning film, Gladiator. In many cases (like Commodus) the Tyrant also has a touch of the sociopath in them, only serving to perpetuate their evil deeds. Other memorable tyrants in distinctly different trappings include Prince Humperdink from the Princess Bride, Sheriff Bill Daggett from the film Unforgiven, and last but not least Bill Lumberg from the comedy Office Space. In every case they are a bullying despot who wants power at any price. They attempt to crush their enemies or use them as pawns in order to hold all the power pieces.
Final Installment: Levels 7-9
Like the Wayward Child, the Sociopath exists in a similar delusional state that is marked by infantile feelings of personal omnipotence and grandeur. The primary difference is that the Sociopath needs no higher purpose to justify his actions. This savage predator enjoys cruelty simply because it is cruel. Their antisocial activity fuels itself because the violence and brutality they inflict on others IS the purpose for their existence. In many cases this villain is nothing more than a Monster villain with personality... and typically a bad personality at that. These bad-guys represent the most bloodthirsty of the bunch. Their pathological nature precludes rational thought and only serves to intensify their base desire to inflict suffering on others.
Most murder mystery villains fall in this category, along with a variety of horror villains and a smattering of action hero antagonists. We find these diabolical men and women in both classic and modern stories. The "Red-Leg" Captain, Terrill from The Outlaw Josey Wales is a perfect example of a low-life killer whose vicious behavior propels the action forward and marks the end of a great showdown between his character and Eastwood's portrayal of Josey Wales. Slightly less talkative but no more menacing is the murderous "Biker" from Raising Arizona. This movie villain is uniquely loathsome for the comedy genre and (as a result) generates a more rich stroy-line for an already great film. Last but not least are the twisted minds of the truly depraved such as the red-neck rapist known only as "Zed" in Pulp Fiction. There is perhaps no scene in Tarantino's film that is filled with more fear and menace than when Wallace and Butch suffer at the hands of Zed. In every case these villains represent a depraved creature, hell bent on destroying our heroes both psychologically and physically.
Level 5: The Criminal Mastermind
Delving even deeper into the levels of villainy we are introduced to one of the more diabolical archetypes in the pantheon. The Criminal Mastermind is as subversive and driven as the Wayward Child and as immune to morality as the demented sociopath. However, this villain is not encumbered with a religious or social dogma, nor is he blinded by mental anguish of psychological debilitation. No, this villain executes his plans with a cold and calculated precision that even your high-school chemistry teacher could appreciate. The criminal mastermind's intellect is vast and he uses this intellect as a weapon more deadly than any magic sword or buzzing-chainsaw. That is not to say that he is above the crude arts of torture and death.
It goes without saying that the famous Lex Luthor falls into this category as well as the cruel cunning of Hans Gruber from Die Hard. Their wickedness uses all the tools in the villain tool box including the threat of physical harm. Where these villains are limited is in the scope of their desires. As the title would suggest, they are not out to remake the world in their own image, nor are they hell bent on mankind's destruction. This villain is usually after a quick buck. The all mighty dollar drives this bad-guy. However, if a new world order or the genocide of mankind is the only way to his prize, they will gladly go there.
Level 6: The Tyrant
The Tyrant is an absolute ruler unrestrained by law or morals. He is an usurper of sovereignty. A ruler who exercises absolute power oppressively or brutally. In some cases the Tyrant can have two sides to his persona: The public philanthropist who is generous and sensitive to the political landscape and then the private demon who is a malevolent threat to all who cross his path. In other cases the Tyrant is an outward dictator from top to bottom, stepping on the necks of his citizens in order to create a utopia of his own design. In either case the Tyrant is a master of suppressing dissent and uses his power to maintain absolute control.
Examples of the Tyrant litter both film and television. One Tyrant that typifies these villains is Emperor Commodus from the award winning film, Gladiator. In many cases (like Commodus) the Tyrant also has a touch of the sociopath in them, only serving to perpetuate their evil deeds. Other memorable tyrants in distinctly different trappings include Prince Humperdink from the Princess Bride, Sheriff Bill Daggett from the film Unforgiven, and last but not least Bill Lumberg from the comedy Office Space. In every case they are a bullying despot who wants power at any price. They attempt to crush their enemies or use them as pawns in order to hold all the power pieces.
Final Installment: Levels 7-9
Friday, July 07, 2006
Keys to Modern Storytelling: Villains Part 1 of 3
The 9 Levels of Villainy
Ever wonder why everyones favorite character is the bad guy? Darth Vader, Montgomery Burns, Dr.Hanniball Lector, Norman Bates - all of these characters and more have made the indelible mark on your psyche that most square jawed heroes cannot. What is it about the man in the black hat that so fascinates us? Is it that we see something of ourselves in these vile characters? Perhaps we pity their depravity or we sympathize with their journey into darkness. Maybe we admire their diabolical genius or their power over others. In any case, there is no question that the villain makes the story. Across all works of modern storytelling, a good villain will transform a bland piece of entertainment into an inspiring work, bordering on Homeric fiction. It has been said that the true measure of a hero is based on the quality of his nemesis. What is the hallmark of a true villain? What do villains have in common? This three part issue will take you deep into the 9 levels of villainy and unlock the secrets behind then characters we love to hate.
Level 1: The Cult
The first level and most innocuous of villain is the cult. This individual or group of individuals operate under the pretext of a great devotion, usually religious and often fanatical in nature. The cult uses secrecy and bully tactics to impose their will on others. The cult is at its most dangerous when they outnumber and isolate the hero. Under these conditions the cult is able to use its best weapon of intimidation to either suppress opposition or eradicate it. The villainy of these characters is often fueled by blind faith and/or cultural ignorance. Ultimately these villains are nothing more than misguided individuals, only doing what they have been taught to do by their leaders, their community, or fellow cult members. In the end the threat of this villain is brushed aside when armed with bravery, intelligence, and a modicum of ingenuity.
Examples of cult villains permeatee both classic and modern film. These fantatics can come in many shapes and sizes - both organized like the Thugee members and their mystical leader in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, or they can be a disorganized rabble like the hillbillies from the movie Deliverance. In both cases they represent mankind falling victim to their more sinful impulsess. They are compelled to evil action not because they must, but simply because they want to and have justified their behavior through a flawed and broken belief structure.
Level 2: The Monster
The Monster has been a staple of storytelling for thousands of years. The earliest known Germanic story of Beowulf has the creature known as Grendal. In classic film, Frankenstein's Monster and The Wolf-Man elevated the place of monsters as primary villains. The Monster is typically a mindless (or at best single minded) creature of abnormal form. Often times this villain is considered deformed, "monstrous," or otherwise very imposing in some way. The Monster stalks our hero relentlessly through the story. It uses all of its talents to keep its victims guessing and often racks up a significant body-count before our hero manages to figure out a way of defeating it. The monster can be one of the most frietening of villains because it cannot be reasoned with or conviced to deviate from its present course of action. Unlike the other villains, the Monster is not taking evil action because it is inherently wicked. It does not see right from wrong or good from bad. It acts on instinct because it is "wired" that way.
This villainan device is one that predominates the science fiction and fantasy genre and is often not found in other genres. One very famous exception is the movie Jaws. This giant shark is monstrous in size and relentlessly tracks prey with great cunning. Other monster villains will instantly spring to mind such as the alien in the movie Alien. This is the poster child for the second level of villainy. In science fiction the robot can also be categorized as a monster. The HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey, or The Terminator are both single minded entities programmed to carry out their orders. All are driven by an instictive (or programmed) force beyond their control and are relentless in their objective.
Level 3: Wayward Child
As we delve into deeper levels of villainy, we begin to find a greater depth of wickedness. The Wayward Child represents a fantatical ideologue. Unlike the cultist this villain is masked under a veil of educated sophistication or an expensive bank account. These villains almost always entice followers through their assets, be it wealth, power, of a charisma that defies explanation. Most (including their closest followers) are unaware of how deep their fanaticism goes and they believe themselves to have risen above humanity by virtue of their mission. That mission typically is one of single minded purpose that requires death in order to succeed. Ever the utilitarian, the Wayward Child sees his actions as a necessary act in order to realize the vision.
This villain is often confused with the cultist but when used properly can be a far more satisfying antagonist to the storyline. Examples of our "lost children" include Joe Pesche's character in Good Fellas, The Preacher from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and perhaps more notable than any other - Harry Potter's own Lord Voldemort. In many cases they have all "fallen from favor" and walk a dark path in solitude. All of these men follow their own capricious, wanton, or depraved inclinations with complete disregard for everything and everyone around them. They operatete in secrecy until that secrecy is no longer necessary for their protection. At that moment they proudly announce their rebellion as a destiny of purpose.
Next Installment: Levels 4-6
Ever wonder why everyones favorite character is the bad guy? Darth Vader, Montgomery Burns, Dr.Hanniball Lector, Norman Bates - all of these characters and more have made the indelible mark on your psyche that most square jawed heroes cannot. What is it about the man in the black hat that so fascinates us? Is it that we see something of ourselves in these vile characters? Perhaps we pity their depravity or we sympathize with their journey into darkness. Maybe we admire their diabolical genius or their power over others. In any case, there is no question that the villain makes the story. Across all works of modern storytelling, a good villain will transform a bland piece of entertainment into an inspiring work, bordering on Homeric fiction. It has been said that the true measure of a hero is based on the quality of his nemesis. What is the hallmark of a true villain? What do villains have in common? This three part issue will take you deep into the 9 levels of villainy and unlock the secrets behind then characters we love to hate.
Level 1: The Cult
The first level and most innocuous of villain is the cult. This individual or group of individuals operate under the pretext of a great devotion, usually religious and often fanatical in nature. The cult uses secrecy and bully tactics to impose their will on others. The cult is at its most dangerous when they outnumber and isolate the hero. Under these conditions the cult is able to use its best weapon of intimidation to either suppress opposition or eradicate it. The villainy of these characters is often fueled by blind faith and/or cultural ignorance. Ultimately these villains are nothing more than misguided individuals, only doing what they have been taught to do by their leaders, their community, or fellow cult members. In the end the threat of this villain is brushed aside when armed with bravery, intelligence, and a modicum of ingenuity.
Examples of cult villains permeatee both classic and modern film. These fantatics can come in many shapes and sizes - both organized like the Thugee members and their mystical leader in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, or they can be a disorganized rabble like the hillbillies from the movie Deliverance. In both cases they represent mankind falling victim to their more sinful impulsess. They are compelled to evil action not because they must, but simply because they want to and have justified their behavior through a flawed and broken belief structure.
Level 2: The Monster
The Monster has been a staple of storytelling for thousands of years. The earliest known Germanic story of Beowulf has the creature known as Grendal. In classic film, Frankenstein's Monster and The Wolf-Man elevated the place of monsters as primary villains. The Monster is typically a mindless (or at best single minded) creature of abnormal form. Often times this villain is considered deformed, "monstrous," or otherwise very imposing in some way. The Monster stalks our hero relentlessly through the story. It uses all of its talents to keep its victims guessing and often racks up a significant body-count before our hero manages to figure out a way of defeating it. The monster can be one of the most frietening of villains because it cannot be reasoned with or conviced to deviate from its present course of action. Unlike the other villains, the Monster is not taking evil action because it is inherently wicked. It does not see right from wrong or good from bad. It acts on instinct because it is "wired" that way.
This villainan device is one that predominates the science fiction and fantasy genre and is often not found in other genres. One very famous exception is the movie Jaws. This giant shark is monstrous in size and relentlessly tracks prey with great cunning. Other monster villains will instantly spring to mind such as the alien in the movie Alien. This is the poster child for the second level of villainy. In science fiction the robot can also be categorized as a monster. The HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey, or The Terminator are both single minded entities programmed to carry out their orders. All are driven by an instictive (or programmed) force beyond their control and are relentless in their objective.
Level 3: Wayward Child
As we delve into deeper levels of villainy, we begin to find a greater depth of wickedness. The Wayward Child represents a fantatical ideologue. Unlike the cultist this villain is masked under a veil of educated sophistication or an expensive bank account. These villains almost always entice followers through their assets, be it wealth, power, of a charisma that defies explanation. Most (including their closest followers) are unaware of how deep their fanaticism goes and they believe themselves to have risen above humanity by virtue of their mission. That mission typically is one of single minded purpose that requires death in order to succeed. Ever the utilitarian, the Wayward Child sees his actions as a necessary act in order to realize the vision.
This villain is often confused with the cultist but when used properly can be a far more satisfying antagonist to the storyline. Examples of our "lost children" include Joe Pesche's character in Good Fellas, The Preacher from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and perhaps more notable than any other - Harry Potter's own Lord Voldemort. In many cases they have all "fallen from favor" and walk a dark path in solitude. All of these men follow their own capricious, wanton, or depraved inclinations with complete disregard for everything and everyone around them. They operatete in secrecy until that secrecy is no longer necessary for their protection. At that moment they proudly announce their rebellion as a destiny of purpose.
Next Installment: Levels 4-6
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Top 25 Sci-Fi/Fantasy Heroines - Part 3
9) Dana Scully - The X Files
This FBI special agent was the voice of reason and the quintessential skeptic. She was the perfect foil to Mulder's blind faith in all things paranormal and extra-terrestrial. The two truly shared a partnership and viewers often found Scully in the role of savior as much as her counterpart. As forensic specialist, coroner, and all around scientist, Scully brought a weight and depth to the series that placed the show apart from the rank and file "creep-shows." Cool and collected, hardly anything phased this professional woman. But Scully also proved to be open in mind and heart. As Scully's appreciation grew for her partner she both showed true compassion for Mulder and true belief in his mission. In the face of undeniable facts and the later absence of Mulder, Scully took up his torch with a zeal and loyalty that proved her character could grow beyond a stereotype.
8) Elizabeth Swann - Pirates of the Caribbean
This young aristocrat was the rebellious and pirate loving daughter of Governor Weatherby Swann. From the beginning of the film, Elizabeth proves to have nerves of steel, insisting that her maid-servant hide while she defend her home from pirates. Even as a captive of the gruesome Barbossa, she still maintains her composure and thinks on her feet, invoking the rule of "parlay." Later in the film she continued to demonstrate her guile by tricking the master-trickster, Jack Sparrow while marooned on a deserted island. Despite Elizabeth's delicate appearance she also proves to be brave in battle, fighting side by side with Will Turner. This summer, Elizabeth will vault from respectable fantasy character to franchise fantasy heroine when the Caribbean sequel hits theaters. We welcome the new adventures of Ms. Swann.
7) Emma Peel - Avengers
The character of Emma Peel broke new ground for sci-fi babes everywhere. Like few others in the 1960s Emma was a feminist heroine, overturning stereotypical portrayals of women. As a martial arts master, expert fencer and specialist in chemistry and other sciences she was one of the very first super-she-spies on television. Perhaps more amazing was the fact that the character of Emma Peel was a replacement for a previously popular female side-kick, Cathy Gale. Despite her feminist ways Mrs. Peel always made the most of her feminine attributes, often sporting the leather catsuit she made famous. Peel's relationship with Partner Steed is one of true equals. It was with regret that viewers said goodbye to Mrs. Peel when Mr. Peel was returned home having been MIA for several years. It turns out not even the great Emma can escape her traditional wife routes and the reason she ranks no higher on this list.
6) Aeryn Sun - Farscape
This former Peacekeeper represents a new evolution of science fiction heroine. As part of the critically acclaimed franchise Farscape, Aeryn Sun's character goes through a dramatic transformation. At first Aeryn is introduced as an antagonist to the hero John Crichton, but later recognizes she is a criminal on the run from her own people and can never return to her former life. During her time on Moya Aeryn evolves from a detached and heartless soldier into a loyal shipmate and faithful friend. Eventually Crichton and Aeryn become equal partners and she adopts the mantel of loving wife and mother by the series end. What is so unique about this character is the reverse engineering that she undergoes. When we first meet Aeryn there is no question that she is a hardened warrior and it is the slow transformation into a softer character that we relish. However, throughout change, she never loses the true essence of her character. A strong willed and determined woman with a never-say-die attitude that typifies what we have come to expect. She will never take a back-seat to her fellow heroes and she often is cast as the most heroic of all characters in her franchise... and fans of the show love her for it.
5) Trinity - The Matrix
A child of the Matrix, Trinity was a notorious computer hacker, until Morpheus showed her the truth behind the Matrix. She was recruited onto the Nebuchadnezzar and since that time began freeing the minds of others that were ready for enlightenment. Trinity, is a powerful and cunning warrior, an expert computer hacker and master martial artists. Trinity operates largely as the savior character throughout most of the first film, helping to guide Neo through his own journey. By the end of the film, Trinity still proves to be a formidable partner in action and never disappoints, taking out the bad-guys with the same stoic determination as ever before. Trinity also represents a re-energizing of the heroic feminine character in film. Following her prominent role in The Matrix, fans of sci-fi fantasy begin to see a growing number of heroine leads.
4) Sarah Conner - Terminator 2
Arguably the damsel in distress in Terminator, Sarah Conner returns for the second installment as a hardened and paranoid figure trapped in a mental institution. Her life was irreversibly altered by the events of the first film and this has made her both determined and vigilant in her mission to escape capture and find her son. Sarah's new look exploded onto film with great popularity amongst fans and casual viewers alike. Much was written about her physical make-over and admirers marveled at the "girl-power" image she portrayed. In fact, the character of Sarah Conner did a great deal to develop a road-map for taking the qualities we admire in our heroes and placing them into our heroines. Never settling to play second fiddle to the "good" Terminator, Sarah Conner continued to assert her leadership throughout the film. Even in the film's climax, when all hope appears lost, she stands between the T2 machine and her son-- playing the role of brave heroine. She is ready to sacrifice everything for the human race. Only in the end, when she knows that her son is truly safe, do we see her let down her guard and reveal the tenderhearted mother underneath.
3) Ellen Ripley - Aliens
Warrant Officer Ellen Ripley can be credited with facing off against the most notorious and deadly alien species in all of science fiction film-- not one but four times! While some might question the validity of the final two films, Ripley's role in the first two (Alien and Aliens) is more than enough to vault her into the top 5 of this list. In both films, Ripley plays the cautious and intuitive heroine, while everyone around her acts the fool. Inevitably, as the bodies pile up against the deadly Alien(s), Ripley is forced to take charge in an effort to save her life and those around her. She displays a level of courage in the face of real terror, never allowing herself to lose her cool. She also demonstrated a warrior's spirit when she defeats the Alien Queen while piloting a "transformers-esque" forklift. This franchise (along with the character of Ripley) expanded the potential of the genre to include gritty real-world mythologies (and their heroines) we see later in other landmark franchises like The Matrix, Battlestar Galactic and many more.
2) Buffy Summers - Buffy the Vampire Slayer
The Chosen One who will protect mankind from the dark terrors of the demon underworld. Perhaps no other character on this list goes through a more personal journey than this heroine. As viewers we followed her from her early highschool years when she attempted to reject her destiny, only wanting to be a normal girl. Eventually Buffy embraced her destiny and adopted the mantel of leadership amongst her peers, making the protection of her friends and fellow classmates a top priority. We witnessed the growing pains of leaving her childhood behind her and becoming someone who not only felt responsible for saving all of Sunnydale but the World! Buffy manages to display all the qualities of a great leader and savior while still being cast as a "real" character with all the foibles that come with being human. We see Buffy make terrible mistakes and then suffer the consequences all the while emerging stronger and wiser when she comes out the other side. In the final days of Buffy's television reign, we never see her take a back-seat to her male counterparts. It is always and only ever Buffy's job to protect us from the evils that lurk in the shadows.
1) Princess Lea - Star Wars
No heroine in science fiction or fantasy entertainment is more iconic than Princess Leia. Standing as the sole heroine in the greatest science fiction franchise of all time is a tall order, but Princess Leia pulls it off with flying colors. Bursting onto the silver screen as an outspoken and hard-headed rebel leader, Leia Organa was both beautiful princess and hardened warrior. While trapped in the Death Star she never betrayed her cause, even when it cost her entire home world their lives. She later demonstrated her combat abilities, by fighting side by side with Luke and Han as they battled their way out of the Death Star. In subsequent films, Leia continued to operate in a position of significant authority in the rebel alliance, and can be credited as a key strategic architect in the evacuation of the rebel base on Hoth. We later see her balance the delicate virtues of her love of Han Solo with the hard decisions that must be made in a time of war. Perhaps nothing is more memorable than the infamous "iron-bikini" she wore as Jabba's slave in the final film. This image would forever be the standard by which all women were measured for young boys everywhere. Even in the end, when she was revealed to be Luke's twin (Vader's daughter) Leia bravely fought alongside her "brother's in arms," making it possible for the rebel alliance to become victorious over the Empire. With the huge success of the Princess Leia character, the role of major heroine was forever secured for future generations. Thank you, Princess. Thank you very much.
This FBI special agent was the voice of reason and the quintessential skeptic. She was the perfect foil to Mulder's blind faith in all things paranormal and extra-terrestrial. The two truly shared a partnership and viewers often found Scully in the role of savior as much as her counterpart. As forensic specialist, coroner, and all around scientist, Scully brought a weight and depth to the series that placed the show apart from the rank and file "creep-shows." Cool and collected, hardly anything phased this professional woman. But Scully also proved to be open in mind and heart. As Scully's appreciation grew for her partner she both showed true compassion for Mulder and true belief in his mission. In the face of undeniable facts and the later absence of Mulder, Scully took up his torch with a zeal and loyalty that proved her character could grow beyond a stereotype.
8) Elizabeth Swann - Pirates of the Caribbean
This young aristocrat was the rebellious and pirate loving daughter of Governor Weatherby Swann. From the beginning of the film, Elizabeth proves to have nerves of steel, insisting that her maid-servant hide while she defend her home from pirates. Even as a captive of the gruesome Barbossa, she still maintains her composure and thinks on her feet, invoking the rule of "parlay." Later in the film she continued to demonstrate her guile by tricking the master-trickster, Jack Sparrow while marooned on a deserted island. Despite Elizabeth's delicate appearance she also proves to be brave in battle, fighting side by side with Will Turner. This summer, Elizabeth will vault from respectable fantasy character to franchise fantasy heroine when the Caribbean sequel hits theaters. We welcome the new adventures of Ms. Swann.
7) Emma Peel - Avengers
The character of Emma Peel broke new ground for sci-fi babes everywhere. Like few others in the 1960s Emma was a feminist heroine, overturning stereotypical portrayals of women. As a martial arts master, expert fencer and specialist in chemistry and other sciences she was one of the very first super-she-spies on television. Perhaps more amazing was the fact that the character of Emma Peel was a replacement for a previously popular female side-kick, Cathy Gale. Despite her feminist ways Mrs. Peel always made the most of her feminine attributes, often sporting the leather catsuit she made famous. Peel's relationship with Partner Steed is one of true equals. It was with regret that viewers said goodbye to Mrs. Peel when Mr. Peel was returned home having been MIA for several years. It turns out not even the great Emma can escape her traditional wife routes and the reason she ranks no higher on this list.
6) Aeryn Sun - Farscape
This former Peacekeeper represents a new evolution of science fiction heroine. As part of the critically acclaimed franchise Farscape, Aeryn Sun's character goes through a dramatic transformation. At first Aeryn is introduced as an antagonist to the hero John Crichton, but later recognizes she is a criminal on the run from her own people and can never return to her former life. During her time on Moya Aeryn evolves from a detached and heartless soldier into a loyal shipmate and faithful friend. Eventually Crichton and Aeryn become equal partners and she adopts the mantel of loving wife and mother by the series end. What is so unique about this character is the reverse engineering that she undergoes. When we first meet Aeryn there is no question that she is a hardened warrior and it is the slow transformation into a softer character that we relish. However, throughout change, she never loses the true essence of her character. A strong willed and determined woman with a never-say-die attitude that typifies what we have come to expect. She will never take a back-seat to her fellow heroes and she often is cast as the most heroic of all characters in her franchise... and fans of the show love her for it.
5) Trinity - The Matrix
A child of the Matrix, Trinity was a notorious computer hacker, until Morpheus showed her the truth behind the Matrix. She was recruited onto the Nebuchadnezzar and since that time began freeing the minds of others that were ready for enlightenment. Trinity, is a powerful and cunning warrior, an expert computer hacker and master martial artists. Trinity operates largely as the savior character throughout most of the first film, helping to guide Neo through his own journey. By the end of the film, Trinity still proves to be a formidable partner in action and never disappoints, taking out the bad-guys with the same stoic determination as ever before. Trinity also represents a re-energizing of the heroic feminine character in film. Following her prominent role in The Matrix, fans of sci-fi fantasy begin to see a growing number of heroine leads.
4) Sarah Conner - Terminator 2
Arguably the damsel in distress in Terminator, Sarah Conner returns for the second installment as a hardened and paranoid figure trapped in a mental institution. Her life was irreversibly altered by the events of the first film and this has made her both determined and vigilant in her mission to escape capture and find her son. Sarah's new look exploded onto film with great popularity amongst fans and casual viewers alike. Much was written about her physical make-over and admirers marveled at the "girl-power" image she portrayed. In fact, the character of Sarah Conner did a great deal to develop a road-map for taking the qualities we admire in our heroes and placing them into our heroines. Never settling to play second fiddle to the "good" Terminator, Sarah Conner continued to assert her leadership throughout the film. Even in the film's climax, when all hope appears lost, she stands between the T2 machine and her son-- playing the role of brave heroine. She is ready to sacrifice everything for the human race. Only in the end, when she knows that her son is truly safe, do we see her let down her guard and reveal the tenderhearted mother underneath.
3) Ellen Ripley - Aliens
Warrant Officer Ellen Ripley can be credited with facing off against the most notorious and deadly alien species in all of science fiction film-- not one but four times! While some might question the validity of the final two films, Ripley's role in the first two (Alien and Aliens) is more than enough to vault her into the top 5 of this list. In both films, Ripley plays the cautious and intuitive heroine, while everyone around her acts the fool. Inevitably, as the bodies pile up against the deadly Alien(s), Ripley is forced to take charge in an effort to save her life and those around her. She displays a level of courage in the face of real terror, never allowing herself to lose her cool. She also demonstrated a warrior's spirit when she defeats the Alien Queen while piloting a "transformers-esque" forklift. This franchise (along with the character of Ripley) expanded the potential of the genre to include gritty real-world mythologies (and their heroines) we see later in other landmark franchises like The Matrix, Battlestar Galactic and many more.
2) Buffy Summers - Buffy the Vampire Slayer
The Chosen One who will protect mankind from the dark terrors of the demon underworld. Perhaps no other character on this list goes through a more personal journey than this heroine. As viewers we followed her from her early highschool years when she attempted to reject her destiny, only wanting to be a normal girl. Eventually Buffy embraced her destiny and adopted the mantel of leadership amongst her peers, making the protection of her friends and fellow classmates a top priority. We witnessed the growing pains of leaving her childhood behind her and becoming someone who not only felt responsible for saving all of Sunnydale but the World! Buffy manages to display all the qualities of a great leader and savior while still being cast as a "real" character with all the foibles that come with being human. We see Buffy make terrible mistakes and then suffer the consequences all the while emerging stronger and wiser when she comes out the other side. In the final days of Buffy's television reign, we never see her take a back-seat to her male counterparts. It is always and only ever Buffy's job to protect us from the evils that lurk in the shadows.
1) Princess Lea - Star Wars
No heroine in science fiction or fantasy entertainment is more iconic than Princess Leia. Standing as the sole heroine in the greatest science fiction franchise of all time is a tall order, but Princess Leia pulls it off with flying colors. Bursting onto the silver screen as an outspoken and hard-headed rebel leader, Leia Organa was both beautiful princess and hardened warrior. While trapped in the Death Star she never betrayed her cause, even when it cost her entire home world their lives. She later demonstrated her combat abilities, by fighting side by side with Luke and Han as they battled their way out of the Death Star. In subsequent films, Leia continued to operate in a position of significant authority in the rebel alliance, and can be credited as a key strategic architect in the evacuation of the rebel base on Hoth. We later see her balance the delicate virtues of her love of Han Solo with the hard decisions that must be made in a time of war. Perhaps nothing is more memorable than the infamous "iron-bikini" she wore as Jabba's slave in the final film. This image would forever be the standard by which all women were measured for young boys everywhere. Even in the end, when she was revealed to be Luke's twin (Vader's daughter) Leia bravely fought alongside her "brother's in arms," making it possible for the rebel alliance to become victorious over the Empire. With the huge success of the Princess Leia character, the role of major heroine was forever secured for future generations. Thank you, Princess. Thank you very much.
Friday, June 09, 2006
Top 25 Sci-Fi/Fantasy Heroines - Part 2
17) Cordellia Chase - Angel
This school-yard villain, turned Buffy side-kick, eventually found her way into becoming a formidable heroine in the Angel series. No character on this list has gone through more transformations than Cordellia Chase. Evidence of her heroine chops first showed themselves when she was still just a young high-school girl, fighting alongside her fellow Sunnydale vampire hunters. It wasn't until she hooked up with Angel that she inherited special powers of cognition and the moral backbone that went along with it. Throughout the Angel series Cordy proved to be someone that stood up for those in need and although her final days were spent possessed by a demon, she eventually returned as a ghost to redeem herself.
16) Sydney Bristow - Alias
Sydney Bristow manages to skirt the fine line between action super-spy and friendly girl-next-door the same way her series Alias manages to walk the fine line between TV drama and cult science fiction. But Sydney has faced off against enough bizarre phenomena to qualify for a first-class heroine in the genre. This international secret agent manages to balance a hectic school schedule and saving the world from evil terrorists, all the while, planning a wedding shower for her favorite roommate. That was until she dropped her regular identity and went full-on-she-spy! Unlike many from this list, Sydney truly stands alone as the primary protagonist and heroine for her series. You will not find this one being turned into the damsel in distress and for that she deserves your respect!
15) Hermione Granger - Harry Potter
This young witch has come a long way in the last four years and most Harry Potter fans can't wait to see where she will go next. Hermione goes from a precocious "1st year" over-achiever to a formidable "4th year" junior wizard. During that time the young witch has saved both her friends and herself from all manner of dangerous encounter. Very few heroines can boast the proper skills, much less the intestinal fortitude that Hermione portrays, but this young lady manages to stand tall amongst her fellow heroes as a part of a significant franchise in the fantasy genre.
14) Barbarella - Barbarella
This swinging sixties sci-fi character redefined the role of heroines in the genre. Barbarella was both capable and free-spirited. In one minute she could court a lover and in the next minute she would defeat the bad-guys. Although the film is difficult to understand and the story-arc is convoluted, there is no argument of her strong historical impact on the science fiction industry.
13) Deanna Troi - Star Trek: The Next Generation
This Starfleet officer proved to be an invaluable member of the Enterprise crew over the years. Troi was half-human and half-Betazed and one of many that joined Starfleet as part of their counselor corps. Troi was capable of inter-species telepathy and proved to be an excellent negotiator, strategist, and counselor for Captain Picard. Troi embodied the Starfleet ideal: compassionate, forthright, and determined. Deanna often developed solutions to problems when there were none before.
12) Marion Ravenwood - Raiders of the Lost Ark
Indiana Jones never did better than his first female companion. Marion is tough on the outside with a heart of gold on the inside. She can drink a 300 pound man under the table and fight off Arab assassins with a frying pan. She is also able to demonstrate her softer feminine side, but only in an effort to orchestrate her escape from Belloch, the archeologist. Although she might be a little nervous around snakes, she manages to weather the wrath of God, which says a great deal for her strength of will. There is no question that Marion could go toe-to-toe with any slick starlet they trot out in modern sci-fi/fantasy film.
11) Padme - Star Wars
As Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa's birth mother, this alone argues placement in the top 25. However, Padme proves to be a worthy heroine in her own right. Although her impact on the prequals lessens in each film, Padme can be credited for being the mastermind behind the defeat of the Nimodians on Naboo and the impetus for the future rebel alliance. Nevermind that whole part about placing Palpatine in power or that bit about contributing to the fall of Anakin Skywalker. She's Luke and Leia's mommy so back off!
10) Number Six - Battlestar Galactica
Many might argue against Number Six as a heroine, but to her own people (the Cylons) that is exactly what she is. Masquerading as a human in the vanguard of the Cylon initiative, Number Six carried on an elaborate affair with Gaius Baltar without him ever knowing the difference. She subsequently infiltrated the human's primary defense grid and brought about the destruction of the 12 colonies, bringing the human race to the brink of extinction. Her place in the new series (more than any other) has re-defined Battlestar Galactica, making it a fresh and unique stand-alone franchise. Since that time Number Six continues her quest to defeat the humans, although recent events begin to bring her loyalties into question. What is not in question is this characters impressive array of skills and abilities.
This school-yard villain, turned Buffy side-kick, eventually found her way into becoming a formidable heroine in the Angel series. No character on this list has gone through more transformations than Cordellia Chase. Evidence of her heroine chops first showed themselves when she was still just a young high-school girl, fighting alongside her fellow Sunnydale vampire hunters. It wasn't until she hooked up with Angel that she inherited special powers of cognition and the moral backbone that went along with it. Throughout the Angel series Cordy proved to be someone that stood up for those in need and although her final days were spent possessed by a demon, she eventually returned as a ghost to redeem herself.
16) Sydney Bristow - Alias
Sydney Bristow manages to skirt the fine line between action super-spy and friendly girl-next-door the same way her series Alias manages to walk the fine line between TV drama and cult science fiction. But Sydney has faced off against enough bizarre phenomena to qualify for a first-class heroine in the genre. This international secret agent manages to balance a hectic school schedule and saving the world from evil terrorists, all the while, planning a wedding shower for her favorite roommate. That was until she dropped her regular identity and went full-on-she-spy! Unlike many from this list, Sydney truly stands alone as the primary protagonist and heroine for her series. You will not find this one being turned into the damsel in distress and for that she deserves your respect!
15) Hermione Granger - Harry Potter
This young witch has come a long way in the last four years and most Harry Potter fans can't wait to see where she will go next. Hermione goes from a precocious "1st year" over-achiever to a formidable "4th year" junior wizard. During that time the young witch has saved both her friends and herself from all manner of dangerous encounter. Very few heroines can boast the proper skills, much less the intestinal fortitude that Hermione portrays, but this young lady manages to stand tall amongst her fellow heroes as a part of a significant franchise in the fantasy genre.
14) Barbarella - Barbarella
This swinging sixties sci-fi character redefined the role of heroines in the genre. Barbarella was both capable and free-spirited. In one minute she could court a lover and in the next minute she would defeat the bad-guys. Although the film is difficult to understand and the story-arc is convoluted, there is no argument of her strong historical impact on the science fiction industry.
13) Deanna Troi - Star Trek: The Next Generation
This Starfleet officer proved to be an invaluable member of the Enterprise crew over the years. Troi was half-human and half-Betazed and one of many that joined Starfleet as part of their counselor corps. Troi was capable of inter-species telepathy and proved to be an excellent negotiator, strategist, and counselor for Captain Picard. Troi embodied the Starfleet ideal: compassionate, forthright, and determined. Deanna often developed solutions to problems when there were none before.
12) Marion Ravenwood - Raiders of the Lost Ark
Indiana Jones never did better than his first female companion. Marion is tough on the outside with a heart of gold on the inside. She can drink a 300 pound man under the table and fight off Arab assassins with a frying pan. She is also able to demonstrate her softer feminine side, but only in an effort to orchestrate her escape from Belloch, the archeologist. Although she might be a little nervous around snakes, she manages to weather the wrath of God, which says a great deal for her strength of will. There is no question that Marion could go toe-to-toe with any slick starlet they trot out in modern sci-fi/fantasy film.
11) Padme - Star Wars
As Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa's birth mother, this alone argues placement in the top 25. However, Padme proves to be a worthy heroine in her own right. Although her impact on the prequals lessens in each film, Padme can be credited for being the mastermind behind the defeat of the Nimodians on Naboo and the impetus for the future rebel alliance. Nevermind that whole part about placing Palpatine in power or that bit about contributing to the fall of Anakin Skywalker. She's Luke and Leia's mommy so back off!
10) Number Six - Battlestar Galactica
Many might argue against Number Six as a heroine, but to her own people (the Cylons) that is exactly what she is. Masquerading as a human in the vanguard of the Cylon initiative, Number Six carried on an elaborate affair with Gaius Baltar without him ever knowing the difference. She subsequently infiltrated the human's primary defense grid and brought about the destruction of the 12 colonies, bringing the human race to the brink of extinction. Her place in the new series (more than any other) has re-defined Battlestar Galactica, making it a fresh and unique stand-alone franchise. Since that time Number Six continues her quest to defeat the humans, although recent events begin to bring her loyalties into question. What is not in question is this characters impressive array of skills and abilities.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Top 25 Sci-Fi/Fantasy Heroines - Part 1
Here at The Wheel in Space we like to think of ourselves as an equal opportunity blog-space. We pride ourselves on giving equal attention to all and we honor that tradition with a homage to the Heroines of Science Fiction and Fantasy Television and Film. If you enjoyed the recent "Battle Royale" series this latest installment of all things sci-fi and fantasy should be right up your alley. The science team took the data from the prospective candidates and ran it through our laboratory diagnostic facility, making sure to measure and log even the smallest detail. The result was the definitive ranking of the best heroines, earning these tops spots based on a variety of metrics including their skills, abilities, importance to their franchise, quality of their franchise, historical impact on the genre, and overall presentation.
25) Xena - Xena Warrior Princess
This warrior woman first emerged into fandom as a villain in the Hercules series, but her popularity was clear and her own series quickly followed, arguably dwarfing the fan following of her predecessor. Strong, confident, and never afraid to make out with her female side-kick, Gabrielle-- Xena was a formidable heroine during her time on the small screen.
24) Seven of Nine - Star Treck Voyager
The introduction of Seven of Nine brought new life into a limping franchise. With a striking appearance and a compelling back-story, "Seven" captivated an audience that was looking for something new. The character itself was a bold attempt at deconstructing the Borg (one of Star Trek's most notorious foes). Seven was a powerful warrior, a capable scientist and a decisive strategist. But her Borg past did not equip her with traits like compassion or empathy, making Seven one of the most drastic departures from female stereotypes inside a genre that is already known for breaking new ground.
23) Samantha Carter - Stargate SG-1
This rising military star was a valuable asset to the Stargate program. Appointed as the science specialist to the SG-1 team, "Sam" saved the lives of many soldiers and civilians alike in the last ten years. Having grown from a young captain to a seasoned colonel, Sam is the rock of SG-1. This is never more apparent when she takes a leave of absence from the Stargate program, leaving the team disoriented and often times placing themselves in more jeopardy than they otherwise would be if she had been their to guide them with her sound wisdom and logic.
22) Lora/Yori - Tron
This virtual reality character and her human counterpart get points for being the girl on the list you would most likely take home to meet your mom because she is so darn nice. It is no surprise that this movie's female lead makes the list, coming from a film that was decades ahead of its time. Tron took us into the world of virtual reality before such a thing even existed which makes Yori the very first "cyber-chick!" Yori stands by her leading men with unflinching nerve and even is prepared to sacrifice herself for the greater good. Welcome to the top 25, Yori.
21) Evelyn Carnahan - The Mummy
Evelyn is the picture of librarian geekiness. Clumsy, bookish, and socially awkward, but with a heart of gold and a determination that rivals anyone else on this list. Evelyn, faces off with some of the Mummy's most gruesome minions and lives to tell the tale. She leads the expedition of men without a second thought, and she charges into the depths of an ancient crypt like it was the play-zone at McDonald's. Perhaps Evelyn would have ranked higher if not for her lame male counterparts bringing her down.
20) Sylvia - Brotherhood of the Wolf
Sylvia is perhaps one of the most mysterious heroines on this list. For the majority of the film, she is assumed to be a well connected courtesan with knowledge of town secrets. As the story progresses you realize she is so much more. In a dramatic turn-around you learn that Marianne (who you assume to be a protagonist in the film) turns out to be a villain, and Sylvia a secret agent for the French government. Both tempting siren and formidable anti-hero, Sylvia manipulates the game better than anyone, saving our hero at the end and accomplishing her mission.
19) Lana Lang - Smallville
This small town girl started off as not much more than a damsel in distress but over the course of five seasons has turned into a formidable heroine. Overcoming vampirism, possession, and any number of other mystical force, Lana has time and time again managed to survive mortal peril. Most recently she has fearlessly sided with the evil Zod, but true Smallville fans can expect her to eventually see the light and will come to the aid of Clark and company.
18) Arwen - The Fellowship of the Ring
Elf wizard and warrior, Arewn's heroine status is elevated from book to film. She single handedly saved the fellowship from certain death when she selflessly took Frodo in her arms and ran from the Nazgul. But nerve wasn't enough to save Frodo. She flexed her mystical muscle, causing an tidal wave of water to take out the undead kings. Being the fiance to the King of all Gondor is no slouch position either. Arwen certainly earns her place on this list.
25) Xena - Xena Warrior Princess
This warrior woman first emerged into fandom as a villain in the Hercules series, but her popularity was clear and her own series quickly followed, arguably dwarfing the fan following of her predecessor. Strong, confident, and never afraid to make out with her female side-kick, Gabrielle-- Xena was a formidable heroine during her time on the small screen.
24) Seven of Nine - Star Treck Voyager
The introduction of Seven of Nine brought new life into a limping franchise. With a striking appearance and a compelling back-story, "Seven" captivated an audience that was looking for something new. The character itself was a bold attempt at deconstructing the Borg (one of Star Trek's most notorious foes). Seven was a powerful warrior, a capable scientist and a decisive strategist. But her Borg past did not equip her with traits like compassion or empathy, making Seven one of the most drastic departures from female stereotypes inside a genre that is already known for breaking new ground.
23) Samantha Carter - Stargate SG-1
This rising military star was a valuable asset to the Stargate program. Appointed as the science specialist to the SG-1 team, "Sam" saved the lives of many soldiers and civilians alike in the last ten years. Having grown from a young captain to a seasoned colonel, Sam is the rock of SG-1. This is never more apparent when she takes a leave of absence from the Stargate program, leaving the team disoriented and often times placing themselves in more jeopardy than they otherwise would be if she had been their to guide them with her sound wisdom and logic.
22) Lora/Yori - Tron
This virtual reality character and her human counterpart get points for being the girl on the list you would most likely take home to meet your mom because she is so darn nice. It is no surprise that this movie's female lead makes the list, coming from a film that was decades ahead of its time. Tron took us into the world of virtual reality before such a thing even existed which makes Yori the very first "cyber-chick!" Yori stands by her leading men with unflinching nerve and even is prepared to sacrifice herself for the greater good. Welcome to the top 25, Yori.
21) Evelyn Carnahan - The Mummy
Evelyn is the picture of librarian geekiness. Clumsy, bookish, and socially awkward, but with a heart of gold and a determination that rivals anyone else on this list. Evelyn, faces off with some of the Mummy's most gruesome minions and lives to tell the tale. She leads the expedition of men without a second thought, and she charges into the depths of an ancient crypt like it was the play-zone at McDonald's. Perhaps Evelyn would have ranked higher if not for her lame male counterparts bringing her down.
20) Sylvia - Brotherhood of the Wolf
Sylvia is perhaps one of the most mysterious heroines on this list. For the majority of the film, she is assumed to be a well connected courtesan with knowledge of town secrets. As the story progresses you realize she is so much more. In a dramatic turn-around you learn that Marianne (who you assume to be a protagonist in the film) turns out to be a villain, and Sylvia a secret agent for the French government. Both tempting siren and formidable anti-hero, Sylvia manipulates the game better than anyone, saving our hero at the end and accomplishing her mission.
19) Lana Lang - Smallville
This small town girl started off as not much more than a damsel in distress but over the course of five seasons has turned into a formidable heroine. Overcoming vampirism, possession, and any number of other mystical force, Lana has time and time again managed to survive mortal peril. Most recently she has fearlessly sided with the evil Zod, but true Smallville fans can expect her to eventually see the light and will come to the aid of Clark and company.
18) Arwen - The Fellowship of the Ring
Elf wizard and warrior, Arewn's heroine status is elevated from book to film. She single handedly saved the fellowship from certain death when she selflessly took Frodo in her arms and ran from the Nazgul. But nerve wasn't enough to save Frodo. She flexed her mystical muscle, causing an tidal wave of water to take out the undead kings. Being the fiance to the King of all Gondor is no slouch position either. Arwen certainly earns her place on this list.
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