Extra Cheese

There just isn't pleasing some people! Who the hell knew Vader had a heart condition and Chewy only eats kosher? So the bacon-bar wasn't going over well with my new partners. Fine! Never mind the fact that everyone else loved it. But let's not forget that CyberD is a team player. So out goes the bacon-bar and in comes the next best thing since sliced bread! Literally.

What goes great on hamburgers, pizza, crackers, and heroine? That's right...

CHEESE. And while you're at it, make it extra-cheese. So I'm officially announcing that 2007 is the year of extra-cheese at The Wheel in Space.

I mean who doesn't like cheese? Apparently Han Solo. How was I supposed to know that he's lactose intolerant?

Give me a F-ing break!

Record Turn-Out for First Apperance

The outpouring of support almost brings me to tears. If I wasn't so manly I'd probably have to use a kleenex right about now. It means a great deal that the people demonstrate their support with all the letters, emails, and ransom notes. I'm touched. I'm mostly touched by this crowd from my most recent appearance. Here are a few quotes from the rest of the team. You can tell they are moved as well.

Han: I owe YOU one, CyberD.

Vader: The foce is strong with this one.

Luke: But I was going to go to Tachi Station to pick up some power converters!

Chewy: Arrrrgggghhhhh!

R2-D2: Bleep!

Anyway, thanks again for all your support.

Sad news to report

As much as you loyal fans might assume that I am pleased by this recent turn of events, I must say that I am saddened that the group that I worked so hard to establish has now been relegated to appearing to an empty house in small-town corner bars.

That's right. It looks like the luster of The Quad has already worn off after the disappointing split late last week. Who knows what the fates have in store for them (most likely bankruptcy, massive drug-problems, rehab and jobs as used car salesmen) but I really do wish them the best of luck.

At least the booze was free at their last gig... so I heard.

CyberD gets great back-up team!

That's right, my loyal fans can see it here at The Wheel before the news sweeps the nation. Come tomorrow you're going to see this in The Wall Street Journal, U.S. News, and the New York Times. I must say that I'm super excited about this and I can't help but wish I had made this change sooner.

Believe it! You know what also doesn't suck in addition to me?

That's right... Star Wars.

And I've just signed a deal for Vader, Skywalker, and the rest of the crew to back up my new solo career! Eat you're heart out, Quad-Suck!

The Rumors are True

I understand that this news has shocked the nation. Apparently Dagromm, believes he is Eddie Van Halen but without the rockin' hair-style and bad-ass guitar riffs. Now that I think about it, Eddie Van Halen kind of sucked anyway. You know what doesn't suck?

Me.

But what hurts most is the silence from Q and Gyuss. That cuts deep and I suppose there is nothing more to be said. Good luck getting any pub without your front-man! That's right. I've been pulling these guys along for years. And I'm sorry it has taken me this long to respond but I wanted to make sure all my adoring fans had something exciting to look forward to.

I'm going solo. Believe it! You can expect all of the same great genius from my solo career that you did from The Quad. And I sware that I look bitchin' in spandex pants... unlike Dagromm!

One of the first big changes around here is going to be the 24 hour bacon-bar-buffet. I've been bringing up awesome ideas like this for a long time only for the rest of The Quad to shoot it down. And prepare yourself for a multitude of more brilliance.