After 6 seasons of gripping television, LOST finally came to a dramatic two and a half hour conclusion last night on ABC. I can make a strong case for LOST as one of my all time favorites. In fact there are few shows that hooked me the way LOST has and even fewer whose finale proved to be satisfying. That's not to say LOST's finale didn't have its fair share of problems but - by in large - I was pleased with the questions it chose to answer and willing to accept the ambiguity of the questions it chose to side-step. As far as the ending itself is concerned, I told my wife that I just wanted there to be a happy ending. With so many of the main cast becoming casualties I hoped that somehow the creators of the show would bring some kind of meaningful closure to the sacrifices that everyone was forced to make. But we'll get to that. First I want to share my own interpretation of some of the series major questions.

1) Who are Jacob and The Man in Black?

We now know that both Jacob and The Man in Black have been with us from the opening of the series. At first these god-like characters weren't given full form. Jacob hid behind his faithful followers known as The Others, and The Man in Black only appeared as a menacing pillar of black smoke. To make matters more confusing our heroes assumed Jacob was a villain character due to the flawed nature of his followers The Others and how those Others treated the castaways. Eventually we learn that Ben's assertion of, "We're the good guys," at the end of season 2 wasn't entirely false. Jacob, while cryptic and mercurial, proved to be a force of good protecting the island and its mystical heartbeat - a glowing pool of light beneath an underwater cave. Meanwhile The Man in Black still remains somewhat of an enigma. I've read that the show's creators did have a name for The Man in Black, but for the sake of simplicity I'll call him Esau from this point forward. We learn that Jacob and Esau are fraternal twin brothers. But when Esau decides to turn his back on the island and kills his adoptive mother, Jacob turns on Esau and throws him down into the cavern and into the white light. While we are to understand the light is a source of great happiness and joy, we are also lead to believe that going into the light can lead to great torment. This myth holds true when Esau emerges from the light as the evil smoke monster. It is this viewers belief that what diabolical terror was to be had within the golden pool of light was released by Esau. The real Esau is now dead and the Smoke Monster takes the form of Esau as well as countless others as he tries to find a way of leaving the island. What remains are two opposing forces the good (albeit pragmatic) Jacob tirelessly working to keep the evil (and arguably cunning) Smoke Monster from unleashing it's power upon the world.

2) What are the laws of the universe that define the Island and it's power?

This question is really a catch all for questions like why Richard Alpert is immortal, why Jacob and Esau cannot hurt each other directly, How and why are people able to find or leave the island and much much more. I believe most of these questions can be answered with one of the final lines in the series. When Ben Linus suggests to Hurley that he could help Desmond find his way home, Hurley assumes that the laws of the Island preclude people from leaving. Ben asserts that such a law was "Jacob's way" and that perhaps now that Hurley is the protector, he can do things his way - that being to help others. So perhaps the reason why Richard Alpert is immortal is because Jacob the Protector can simply make it so. Perhaps the powers of the Island give it's protector certain abilities to define some rules of the Universe. The mother protector decried that Jacob and Esau would be unable to hurt each other and yet they were clearly able to do so. However, at no time in the series was a The Protector and the Smoke Monster able to hurt each other. Perhaps this is something the Mother Protector knew intuitively. In this way, Jacob was safe from the Smoke Monster until he convinced one of Jacob's own followers to summon him and then kill him.

3) What did the Smoke Monster really want?

In my opinion the gold light both held the secrets of life but also held trapped a terrible evil. But when Jacob killed his own brother, the evil was released from the underground cave. But this wouldn't be enough. The evil wanted to consume the world. Jacob, having realized his mistake now had two tasks set before him. He hand to continue to protect the golden light at the heart of the island but he also had to protect the world from The Smoke Monster. He did this by harnessing the supernatural power of the Island to keep the Monster there. This is evident in Jacob's conversation with Richard Alpert about the bottle of wine being the evil and cork being the island. For centuries the Smoke Monster believed his way off the Island was to kill Jacob. The Smoke Monster considered Jacob not only the Protector of the Island but also his Jailer. This proved to be a miscalculation. After killing Jacob the Smoke Monster set about trying to get all of Jacob's candidates to leave the island with him. He knew that if any candidate was left behind, they might become The Protector and once again trap the monster on the island. But when his plans unraveled the Smoke Monster changed his tactics. He decided to destroy the Island and planned to use one very special man, named Desmond, to do it.

4) Why did the rules of the Island change near the end?

Why did Richard Alpert start to age? Why could evil-Locke and Jack the Protector harm each other? Simple: The Island's power was snuffed out by Desmond. This meant all the mystical protections and rules were broken. Richard got gray hair and the forces of good and evil could now do battle. The one thing that would have allowed the Smoke Monster to leave the island was the one thing that made him vulnerable. Surely such vulnerability would have been one of the Smoke Monsters considerations before destroying the island. Perhaps when one goes back through the series and looks at the actions of the Smoke Monster they all begin to make some kind of sense. Perhaps every act taken was in an attempt to weaken Jacob. For the first time I am given some sense of closure to the death of Echo, a powerfully spiritual man who - in retrospect (as a Protector candidate) - would have been a terrible threat to the Smoke Monster.

5) What is the significance of the Sideways Reality/Purgatory?

In the end the Sideways Reality provided this viewer with the happy ending closure I desired. The big twist is that the Sideways Reality wasn't really a reality at all but a kind of post-death-limbo where the souls of the castaways reside before moving on to a better place. When Juliet dies and speaks to Miles, telling him that Jack's plan to change the time-stream and avert the plane crash, she tells the truth. After death Juliet would have a unique perspective on the limbo universe where all the ones we love are there for the finding. Juliet told Miles it worked because she was able to be with all those she loved again. For us long time Lost viewers some will cry foul with the use of any gimmick that even remotely resembles Purgatory. But that's because many were of the opinion that the Island itself was Purgatory. But such a device gives the series creators an opportunity to make good on all the relationships with our fallen heroes. Jack's father, Christian Shepard, said it best when he told his son that what happened on the Island was real and that those times together with those people were the most important in his life. This place, where the characters now find themselves, is a place of their own making where the people most dear can come together and move on with the one they love at their side.

Did this series answer all its questions? No. But what it did do was provide fascinating character study about love and loss, about virtues and vice, and about learning to overcome our own personal failings in an effort to live a life of redemption and purpose.

Top 5 Greatest Movies You've Never Seen

I saw The Wrestler last month. If you've seen it you should agree with me that it was most awesome. I hadn't seen Mickey Rorke in anything good since... well, I hadn't seen him in anything since I last rented Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man. Now that movie kicked serious bootie. And that got me thinking about some great movies that you've never seen. So let's begin.

5) Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man


You know those action movies with the straight laced hero and his wild and crazy hero friend? That's not this movie. Take out the bland hero and replace him with another wild-ass, butt kickin', crazy in the head alcoholic who is fighting to save one man's daughter against a band of rabid drug lords who have no idea who they're messing with and you have this rockin' 80's movie gone wild!

4) Face/Off


This is a movie with one of the most ludicrous premises I've ever heard of and I love it. It really is a guilty pleasure at the top of my list along with Maria Carey and Sour Patch Kids. You know that movie about the never say die police hero up against the crazy terrorist? That's not this movie. But if you take those two characters and surgically swap their faces along with relative body hair and vocal chords and then plop them into each other's respective worlds then you have one of the most guns-blazing, window shattering, compound-bone-fracturing, movies of its time.

3) Rosencrance and Gildenstern are Dead


You know that movie about two dumb ass retards that travel the countryside getting into all sorts of ridiculous trouble? No, not Dumb and Dumber... well kind of. This is if Shakespeare wrote Dumb and Dumber, and it's a damn fine flick. With Gary Oldman and Tim Roth playing the title characters you get two of the most dark and twistedly talented actors playing against type and making high English writing actually sound funny. Rent this!

2) Diggstown


You know that movie about the con man who changes his ways after falling in love in small town America. Take that movie and throw in a vicious rural tycoon, a very young and up and coming Heather Graham, and more double crosses than a twizzler and you have this movie. That and Louis Gossett Junior kicks ass.

1) Fandango


There really isn't a comparison for this film. As best I can say it's the first Bro-Mance before there was such a thing. As funny as The Hangover is... this is better. Plus it's probably the only Kevin Costner movie worth a damn. It's at the top of my list, isn't that enough for you to rent it?

Merry Christmas!

10 Things I Hate About The Joe Movie

You can imagine my elation when I first heard about the G.I. Joe Movie rumors from a year ago. Sadly as details slowly leaked out my fears grew and grew. But my biggest mistake was assuming the silver lining to this cloud was going to be lowered expectations. After all, I had seen enough really good movies this summer. What's one bad movie amongst fan-boys? So I went in with eyes wide open and no expectation that my favorite childhood franchise of ALL TIME would be any good. Sadly this movie managed to disappoint even my meager hopes and strain my sincere affection. So was there anything good about the Joe Movie? The action sequences were awesome and the casting of a couple of characters was pretty good or at least serviceable. The worst of this movie... well, I can only hope to scratch the service. So here it goes.

10) The Not To Distant Future: The only reason to make this movie set in "The Future" is to avoid explaining the ridiculous sci-fi stuff like, sonic-wave-rifles, Holographic lap-tops, and Hover planes they stole from the Terminator's garage.

9) Flash-back Faux Pas: Flash backs kicks ass and when done properly really broaden and deepen the mythology of a story in a very short amount of time. Too bad G.I. Joe couldn't flash-back their way out of a paper bag. For starters, you'd think they could manage just two separate back-stories, that of Duke and Snake-Eyes. No they choose to waste five minutes of movie in medieval Scotland and later bore you to tears with endless time spent on flat, emotionless, sequences on why The Baroness and Storm Shadow turn evil. Which brings me to Storm Shadow.

8) Storm Shadow: They almost get it right, but they play him more assassin than noble warrior. Even at his most evil, the comic always made Storm Shadow honorable. I'll admit they gave his character room to inevitably turn good in a later movie, but we can only pray another movie with this crew never happens. Yes, Storm Shadow is a good guy in the end. Maybe that was the confusion with the Baroness, but we'll get to her in a second.

7) Accelerator Suits: I knew going in that these were in the movie, but I didn't expect the CGI to suck so bad. At least make the characters look realistic. CGI has gotten to the point where I shouldn't be able to tell the difference between real stunt action and Buzz Light-Year graphics.

6) Destro: I'll accept the fact that Destro's mask in the comic was awfully animated, but that's all it was. A freaking mask! The man didn't have his skin turned into metal. Who comes up with this shit?

5) Rip-Cord: The reason his codename is Rip-Cord is because the original character was an air force paratrooper. He jumped out of planes, i.e. RIP-CORD!!! He wasn't Duke's side-kick. He wasn't a marine. He was already an the airborne. How hard is it to get even the broadest brush-strokes correct?

4) Evil Plans: So Destro goes to all this trouble to make NATO pay for his state-of-the-art nanites and then goes through the trouble of stealing them back from the government. Why not just over-charge and build more than the measly 4 missiles? And if Destro built the damn things in the first place, why does he need the Baroness' scientist husband to arm them, and why oh why do the highly touted cobra super soldiers fall down like a house of cards when Scarlett sneezes on them.

3) Sgt. Slaughter: Two words... Brendon Frasier.

2) Snake-Eyes: Almost everything about this character worked. I was even willing to ignore the casting of the vertically challenged, Ray Park. But why on earth include a line (at the very end of the movie) about Snake-Eyes taking a vow of silence as his reason for not talking. That's just destroying comic-book continuity for no purpose! He can't talk because his larynx was destroyed by a helicopter explosion!

1) The Baroness: The whole point of having a sexy, dominatrix, villainess is that she is an honest to God VILLAIN, not some corn-fed, all American, girl that's been brainwashed by her crazy-ass brother.

Best Summer Show in Town!

With most TV programming on summer hiatus we are all now accustomed to the tired re-runs, boring re-treds, and experimental disasters that is summer television. But once in a while somebody gets it right. Every so often the planets align to converge on the perfect storm of delicious television goodness. Dancing with the Stars was just such a show and is now a mainstream commercial success. I am pleased to announce that I have stumbled upon another summertime gem. It will likely not have the mass appeal of half-naked dancers but it tickles my fancy quite nicely. I had plans to write paragraphs on the greatness of this program but I'll let it speak for itself. I present to you, Spike TV's: DEADLIEST WARRIOR

I'm about to jump ship

I've been watching Heroes from the the beginning. I got hooked early on and have really enjoyed the ride. I was even excited going into the fall season when others were saying it was done after the strike shortened season of a year ago.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a fan-boy apologist. Meaning, once I embrace a program, I tend to stick with it through thick and thin. I tend to give a a great deal of latitude for it to screw up, become boring, and general suck up the screen. I'm also willing to give a show as mush as en entire season... sometimes two seasons before I pass final judgement. Hell, I'm watching Eureka, about to start season 4 and I still have decided if I like it.

Usually this patience is limited to science fiction and fantasy programing. I watched the first three episodes of Grey's Anatomy with my wife and told her "I'm OUT! This show sucks." Of course that may have been more of a chick-dude thing. Still, if it had been a chick-show with laser guns or dragons I probably would have given it more time.

Still, I'm proud of my sci-fi apologist stance on programing. Sometimes, given time you will find true gems. Farscape is a tremendous show that was cut down too soon. If more people had given it a chance, I am certain it would have been able to at least complete it's 5 year run.

However, I am sad to say that the last two episodes of Heroes has left me flat. I found myself saying, "Who the hell cares what happens to these ass-holes?" I'll not go into agonizing detail but one of the shows stars was put into a position where he had this season's villain dead to rights. The good guy could have put a bullet right between the bad guy's eyes. And guess what, he didn't do it! Whoop de freakin' do! You're such a good guy you aren't going to stoop to his level. How many times do we have to go over that ground. Heroes does it at least three times a season. After 4 seasons that's about 12 times too many.

For the first time I asked myself if I should give it up... I'm torn. Torn deep and I don't know what to do.

Dune... What the Hell?

I decided to read Frank Herbert's science fiction classic: Dune. It didn't take long but I eventually crossed the critical 100 page threshold which commits me unequivocally. I was able to overcome the fact that Herbert didn't write his story in chapters. Did you know Dune is written as 400+ page running stream of consciousness with the occasional page break marked by bizarre mystical quotes from a character you don't see until the last ten pages of the book? I didn't. But I did something with Dune that I have never done before with any other book.

I skimmed paragraphs!

You may think this to be no big deal, but you have to understand how monumental this is. I've never skimmed anything. Not even text books in school. I just can't absorb books that way. I never have. If I'm going to get from beginning to end and understand the full story, I read every word. Word for Word... the entire thing. Otherwise I find myself skipping over critical bits of plot, or subtle nuances of character development.

But with Dune I finally realized (about 200 pages in) that Frank Herbert is one messed up dude. The man did (without question) a shit-load of pot. And occasionally this would manifest in bizarre meandering paragraphs where characters examine their navel's for undetermined periods of time. After the tenth time a character started babbling about some random cosmic connection to the universe I figured out that ultimately it didn't propel the story forward. I just needed to know that they were trippin'... nothing more.

Perhaps I'm not getting my point across. Here's an excerpt from the story.

"Whirling silence settled around Jessica. Every fiber of her body accepted the fact that something profound had happened to it. She felt that she was a conscious mote, smaller than any subatomic particle, yet capable of motion and of sensing her surroundings. Like an abrupt revelation - the curtains whipped away - she realized she had become aware of a psychokinesthetic extension of herself. She was the mote yet not the mote."

What the hell is that? That's the kind of shit I'm talking about. Other than these bizarre acid trips I enjoyed Dune. It is a fantastically creative story with compelling character drama wrapped up in a gritty science fiction shell with shades of religious underpinnings. If you enjoy epic science fiction and you are interested in a story that has spawned thousands of other writers, read Dune.

But you have been warned.

Good TV... Long Overdue!

Watching television this winter has made me feel like a member of the French foreign legion lost in the Sahara desert, with nothing more than a canteen that has a hole in the bottom: Endlessly agonizing.

But spring is finally here and so is some glorious new programming. Lost is on break but watching the new episodes from a few weeks back was like sweet crack cocaine in my veins. Torchwood gets better and better and I'm glad I've given the show time to mature. My Name is Earl was back on this week since January providing us with some classic white trash moments. I'm even enjoying the tired plots of Smallville. But it is the season premiere of Battlestar Galactica that I was most anticipating (next to Doctor Who coming out later this April).


Having had an infinitely long wait since the season 3 finale I've had plenty of time to digest the big reveal... the final 5 Cylons. Or is it? Perhaps it's the big reveal of only 4 of the final 5 Cylons. Can't we all agree that Starbuck is NOT a Cylon? It's too obvious. And aren't they missing out on some shock value to lump that big reveal in with the other 4 Cylons? To be honest I have a problem with Colonel Tigh, Tyrol, and Anders being Cylons, but I'll live. Really the only big Cylon reveal that I did like was the President's aid. This reveal is chock full of wonderful wrinkles that call into question the survival of the human race. Other than forcing the audience to say "Oh my gosh... not Colonel Tigh..." this choice only bogs down the continuity of the show and doesn't make me fear for the human race any more than the impact of the President's second in command being a Cylon. I guess I just like my heroes to stay heroes. I now fear some serious "moral of the story" moment on the horizon.


If the pervasive revelation that some of our best heroes turn out to be Cylons is some trite way of commenting on the nature of good and evil or an attempt to blur the lines of right and wrong... then I shall be well and truly pissed. Can't we just keep our social and political commentary to ourselves?

Perhaps this is the major flaw with Battlestar Galactica as a franchise. The entire mythology lives in this tight vacuum with one set of heroes and one set of villains and nowhere else to expand. They've done the best they could with what they had. They've brought into the story an impressive array of secondary characters and attempted to make them meaningful to the series. But perhaps the series is beginning to collapse in upon itself from the weight of its own expanding mythology. In an attempt to be innovative they are creating logic and continuity problems that begin to require the same kind of brain calisthenics that occurred when Lucas put out the turd-fest of Episodes 1-3 of Star Wars. The more mythology you overlay on a small group of characters the more problems you have with the rules of storytelling.

For me... Starbuck cannot be a Cylon. If she is it will ruin the series. I will stop watching. So happy Sci-Fi everyone!

Book Review: Webster's Way With Words

Last night The Wheel in Space hosted it's Cyber-Book-Club. We've all been reading a really compelling piece of work by Merriam Webster called The Dictionary. Today I'm happy to share with Blog-Country my review of this ground breaking work.

I have to say it is a dauntingly dense read, while at the same time rich with layered subtext. Webster demonstrates his powerful mastery of the English language by weaving into his story an elaborate vocabulary the likes of which I have rarely seen in other work. Webster also impresses with a fine grasp of structured story telling. Each of its 36 chapters are neatly organized, creating a natural flow to the overall work.

Admittedly, the attention to detail is, at times, tedious. While some have blamed Tolkien for taking a paragraph to describe a blade of grass. Webster actually takes paragraphs to describe the words blade, grass, and even the word of!

Still, the precision, creative use of language, and the near perfect specificity make it a gripping tale worthy of any personal library. In fact, more than 35 million people agree with me if the sales numbers have anything to say about it. In short, I highly recommend you go out and purchase a copy of The Dictionary. It is a real page-turner!

Next Month, the Cyber-Club is going to tackle another one of Merriam's great works. The Thesaurus.

Shameless Plug

Does anyone need a refresher on how big a geek I am? No? Okay... So in addition to being a huge fan of things like Doctor Who, Farscape, Star Wars, and yada yada yada, I'm also a monstro-fan of this late 90's Disney cartoon called Gargoyles. It came out while I was in college and a group of my friends made it a point to sit down every afternoon at 3pm to catch the latest episode. UrbanCowboy and Gyuss had the foresight to record episodes on VHS and I was lucky enough to make copies of their collection. So every so often I pull out the old VHS tapes and watch a few episodes of this fantastic story. For those of you who have never watched Gargoyles, I highly recommend it.

Essentially the story is about a group of Gargoyles from medieval times who are frozen in stone by a magic spell for a thousand years. They wake up after the spell is broken and find themselves living in Manhattan. They befriend a New York City cop and together attempt to resume life as protectors of the innocent. The writing is superb, the artwork is (at times) fantastic and the over-arching mythology is a growing tapestry of intrigue that will keep you entertained episode after episode. A few years ago the first season of Gargoyles came out on DVD. I snatched it up in a heartbeat and anxiously awaited season 2. Thankfully DVD sales were good so Disney released the first half of season 2. Unfortunately since that time it appears that DVD sales for the latest release were not as expected and there is a risk that season 2 - part 2 may not happen.

So if you are a fan of great storytelling, exquisite artwork, and edge of your seat adventure I encourage you to try out the Gargoyles series on DVD. Rent it, buy it, borrow it, but if you like it, consider adding it to your DVD library.

Sweet-Clean Programming

With stinkers like Bionic Woman and Chuck laying big fat turds all over your TV set this fall, I thought it high time a few underrated shows get some positive pub. In no particular order I recommend all these beauties and they get my CyberD official stamp of approval.


My first recommendation on this list is Pushing Daisies. This smart and quirky program initially caught my eye with its bold visuals and bizarre premise. The main character, Ned is a Pie Maker. Ever since he was young Ned has had the creepy ability to make the dead live again. Unfortunately if he touches them again they die permanently. If this power wasn't twisted enough, if a person is revived for more than 60 seconds, someone else nearby dies. After a series of circuitous events in the first episode, Ned becomes partnered with a private investigator named Emerson Cod, and his childhood crush, the previously-dead Charlotte Charles. This crime fighting trio now goes about reviving the dead in order to solve their murders and collect outstanding cash rewards as a result. This funny yet twisted tale is a combination of a murder mystery, drama, and comedy all rolled into one. It's really a mys-dram-edy! And it's damn good. Check it out on Wednesday nights on ABC at 8/7c.


My second recommendation is a show called Hotel Babylon. This brash and sexy British drama is a gateway into the world of 5-star hotels. The stories center around Charlie, the new manager, and other dedicated staff as they attempt to cater to the outrageous demands of the guests of Hotel Babylon. Charlie also serves as the narrator, providing general themes for each episode such as the eccentricities of the rich and famous, the debauchery that hotel patrons partake in, or the ability for hotel staff to save or destroy the lives of their guests. Be careful, you may just find that Hotel Babylon becomes your guilty pleasure of this fall season. Check it out on Wednesday nights on BBC America at 9/8c.


Finally, my last recommendation is a show regularly mentioned on my blog and that's Dancing with the Stars. This celebrity-based-reality-tv-contest-show never ceases to amaze me. There have been five seasons of this series and I still get a kick out of watching every week. The current season is about half-way through its run, which means all the really poor celebrities have been kicked off, leaving nothing but the best of the best. Never fear, this is an equal opportunity skin fest with ample flesh on both sides of the isle. That means there is plenty to see for the whole family. The really good news is that almost every season includes a wardrobe malfunction and this hasn't happened yet so you haven't missed anything. Tune in on Monday nights on ABC at 8/7c.

Happy Fun Review Time

I tell you what, I sure do love me some blockbuster online. I got a free movie coupon this week and I skipped on over to the local store to check out what was available. I figured, what better time to rent a crappy B-movie than with a free coupon.

As I am a big fan of My Name is Earl, I happened to notice Jamie Pressly on the cover of DOA: Dead or Alive. Being marginally familiar with the video game I assumed there would be some delicious kung-fu action. Then I noticed it was directed by Corey Yuen who did The Transporter. And while The Transporter was a terrible film it had some of the best martial arts I had seen in a long time.

I snatched DOA off the shelf and didn't look back. Perhaps my expectations were very low but I actually really enjoyed it. The movie wasn't half bad, the acting was tolerable, and the fight scenes were REALLY kick-ass. In fact there was so much juicy, hot, kick-boxing, filled goodness, I went ahead and re-watched some of the highlights. My favorite bit being the knock-down drag-out battle between Cristie and Helena in the rain on the beach.

Bottom Line: I give this movie two thumbs, a middle and an index finger way up!

Here's a little taste of what I'm talking about...

Why Who?

Many of you know that I am a shameful lover of all things Doctor Who. Up until Farscape it was my unequivocal favorite television show of all time, and that's before the new Who series came out. Most in geekdom place the likes of Star Wars, Star Trek, and other American programs in their top favorite shows but so do many "averge joes." However the mainstream viewing audience wouldn't know a sonic screwdriver even if it jumped up and bit them in the ass.

So what is Doctor Who, you ask? And why does CyberD, the bastion of good taste, speak so highly of it? To the uninitiated, Doctor Who is a British sci-fi series, originally produced and screened by the BBC from 1963 to 1989 with a new series launched in early 2005. It is about a wandering traveler of time and space who stumbles across injustice and wrong doing across the universe, and comes to the rescue of those subjugated by evil.

The longevity of this program and the lengths to which passionate fans have successfully returned the series to a modern format is unprecedented. The reason the show is able to reinvent itself so readily is the due to the main characters unique ability to regenerate his body, thereby recasting the lead actor. This bohemian vagabond is a unique intergalactic hero who defeats a vast cornucopia of villainous enemies with a superior intellect rather than a super firearm.

I am proud to say that Doctor Who has been a viewing staple for me since I was just a young cyber-lad. My avatar and blog are a homage to the series. I've burned up miles of VCR tape recording old episodes for my personal library. I even attended a Doctor Who convention when I was in junior high! Wow, I've never admitted that to anyone!

That actually felt kind of good! I feel so... alive! So full of... splendor! I feel like the first ray of sun as it kisses the cool morning dew with its soft warm radiance!

Please excuse me while I strip off all my clothes and run naked through a field of wheat!

Throw-Back Fun Times!

So I just finished watching Tenacious D and The Pick of Destiny. I put it off for several months because Q told me it sucked. I hated to hear that because I introduced the marvelous lyrical musings of JB and KG to The Quad a few years ago. The first album will always rock in infamy for us. It will be forever hard to dethrone that monster record. But I have to say The Pick of Destiny really wasn't terrible. And a couple of the new songs are pretty damn good. But here is a little golden nugget of knowledge for those that are open to enlightenment. The director is a man named Liam Lynch who also happens to be the genius behind the one-off hit: My United States of Whatever as well as a very brief but extremely genius TV show.

Back in the fall of 1998, when Dagromm and I were still living in the same small Texas town, we started getting together for a morning jog. You might call it the slim-down challenge that sparked a national trend. Around that same time we had both begun watching a new late-night comedy called Sifl & Olly. The wacky off-beat humor, performed masterfully by a cornucopia of creative and crazy sock puppet characters had us both laughing our asses off all threw our morning jog the next day. It was good times back then but unfortunately stupid-ass TV executives couldn't see genius even if it jumped up and bit them in the wrinkle stick! The show was canceled. Long live Sifl & Olly!

Harry Potter Secrets Revealed!

I'm no Dagromm, but I am a Potter fan. I started late and read the books fairly quickly to play catch up because Dags was gracious enough to let me borrow his copies. Since I've caught up I haven't had the luxury or reading them ASAP.

When the Order of the Phoenix was coming out my mother (also a Potter fan) asked me if I was excited about the next release. I told her yes, but that I probably wouldn't read it for a couple of months. Shocked she asked why. Because my friend can't let me borrow it right away. He must read it and then his son wants to read it. As a surprise my mother purchased me a copy from Amazon and has continued to do so with every subsequent purchase, although since she and I haven't discussed the Deathly Hallows in any way shape or form I just assumed that the gesture would not be repeated by simple virtue of the fact that it wouldn't occur to her.

In typical mom fashion, she doesn't forget her past generosity and I find a copy of the latest release in my mailbox on Saturday. I have only had time to read the first few pages but I'm here to tell you that I had no idea that the Death Eaters would meet at the Malfoy estate. I can't wait to see what other surprises await!

Gone and done it again

I have had a nasty habit of following TV shows that are really damn good only to result in their cancellation like Farscape, Angel, and Arrested Development just to name a few. Since I've joined Blockbuster Online, my latest trend is to pick up a show that has been out for some time, only to discover that they have ALREADY been canceled, or are in the final death throws of a cancellation. The two most recent being Firefly and Rome.

Well I've gone and done it again! For reasons to complicated to name here, I decided to try out this critically acclaimed series on HBO called Deadwood. The only thing I had heard about it was that it had a great deal of cursing. But I also heard it was pretty damn good. Both turned out to be true... in spades!

What a great show. I've only seen the first four episodes but I am hooked like a heroine junky with a trust fund! I love it so much that I went online today to see when Season 4 might be released on DVD, as I had already noticed the first three seasons were available. Of course the untimely cancellation of Rome should have been my first hint that I shouldn't take such things for granted. It is just now that I learned the show was canceled approximately one year ago.

In the immortal words of Al Swearengen.... "Fucking cocksuckers!" Once again, television executives disappoint me.

Missing the Boat

Back in the fall of 2002 I wasn't really open to new science fiction television. My favorite show had been canceled and I was pretty jaded to anything that remotely resembled it. As it turns out I missed out on a great series called Firefly. But then again, so did many others because it too was eventually canceled. Of course many might argue that it would fail from the beginning with the way Fox Television handled its release. Between jumbling the episodes out of order, not showing the all important pilot until mid-season, and marketing the gritty drama as an action comedy the series was most assuredly doomed.

It's been almost five years now and I've continued to hear nothing but good things. I've wanted to see it for some time, but just never found it available for rent until I joined the greatness of Blockbuster Online. I ordered the first disc and watched it in the order it was originally intended, including the theatrical conclusion Serenity. I've come to my own conclusion: either I'm an official science fiction sucker or this show is greatness... or both... probably both.

Every episode was full of great character driven story. The large ensemble cast had a tremendous chemistry and at no time did it give the feeling of being too cumbersome. I even managed to enjoy the dramatic cinematic conclusion to the series. Granted, it probably pales in comparison to the unrealized continuation of the program. Personally I feel it was completely satisfying, save for the undeveloped storyline of Shepard Book. They've even left the franchise open to future films. But money talks so I've now joined the ranks of Firefly fans telling you to go out and watch this series. It's definitely a good.

Pirates 3 Review - Spoiler Alert

I finally saw the third Pirates of the Caribbean movie last week and I have to say... It was fantastic! I loved it! The pace is quick the story-telling is sharp, and the twists and turns are pleasantly unexpected. Jeffrey Rush has a flare for the humorous while remaining menacing. Johnny Depp continues to delight in a role that has great risk of becoming trite and repetitive after three films. And Chow Yun-Fat injects a new element of vile danger without making the cast feel bloated. The filming is dark, as is the script, costumes, and overall tone of the story, but this is to be expected. After the conclusion of Pirates 2, I think all fans knew it was going down this road.



Some of the high-points for me include a magnificent opening fight sequence in Singapore, a surreal and creepy depiction of Davey Jones' Locker, the duplicitous double-crossing of various characters, and a visually stimulating portrayal of the Pirate Lords that range from Chinese thugs to French bandits to Arabian thieves. And I have to say I'm not too disappointed in the somewhat predictable ending for Will Turner and Elizabeth Swan.

Now for some criticism.

My biggest problem with the film was the introduction and use of the Calypso character. Supposedly Pirates 2 and 3 were written simultaneously and if this is the case, why does the introduction of the Sea Goddess feel so random? Could her role in the overall story not have been worked more smoothly into the fabric of the overall mythos? Additionally, I am still perplexed why Captain Soa Feng (Chow Yun-Fat) mistakes Elizabeth Swan for the human form of Calypso and how Captain Barbossa (Rush) appears to know better from the very start.



Of course the Sea Goddess' role in the films is given more weight as you learn why she was forced to bring Barbossa back from the dead, but if both Barbossa and Sparrow each hold a position as one of the nine Pirate Lords... why was one serving the other on The Black Pearl prior to the first film?

In addition to plot problems such as these, I find it boardering on retarded the way the action in this series goes from the (larger-than-life) theatrical to the ridiculous (ala Matrix/Charlie's Angels)! I know... I know... I can suspend my disbelief for the walking dead and supernatural monsters, but I cannot allow my brain to believe that mere humans can swoop from the masts of various different pirate ships all within the swirling winds of a hurricane!

It is also perplexing to me why the giant sea-battle we expect at the end comes down to the Black Pearl and the Flying Dutchman fighting it out over a maelstrom. Then both ships turn on the British flag-ship blowing it to smithereens, Die Hard style. Apparently this is enough to take the "wind out of the sales" of the entire British Armada and sends them packing!



Finally I understand that Turner and Swan needed to get married for the ending of the movie to work, but I am stupefied as to why it needed to be in the middle of a sea-battle. It just felt silly.

So in conclusion, as you can see, I feel this movie really sucked. I mean... badly! I hated it.

Phoning It In!

I'm not big into reality TV. I've dabbled in most shows like American Idol, Survivor, and even The Apprentice. but nothing has really stuck. My desire to call into shows and vote on contestants is even more minuscule. Enter: Dancing with the Stars. It's been four seasons in and I'm still completely hooked. Of course I watch it for the choreography, costumes, and competition! And for the first time ever, I've actually contemplated the "call in!"

That's right. I'm actually thinking about picking up the phone and wasting seconds of my precious time dialing a number so that my vote can affect the outcome of some meaningless TV show. Or is it meaningless? I mean it isn't really fair that one of my favorite dancers got saddled with a bad celebrity. She doesn't deserve to be kicked off just yet. I think the people of America still want to see a little more of Edyta before it's all over. But what if she gets voted off?

Perhaps there really IS something I can do to help. Oh no! But what about this other one. I'd hate to see them get kicked off. Perhaps I should place my vote here! Too many dancers and too little time! What to do... what to do. I think nobody should get kicked off and everyone should receive a ribbon of participation! How does that sound? Hooray for spray on tan!

Rock and Roll All Night

What a year of the football. My favorite team recently announced an exciting new minority head coach, my favorite quarterback made it to the Super Bowl and single-handidly won the game and then deservedly was anointed the mantel of MVP, placing him amongst the greats of football-all-time. Move over Uncle Rico, there's a new sheriff in town!

It was happy-fun-time a the cyber-home last night. I had a few family members over for a laid back get-together. Little did we know we would rock the house down! We sent the kid to bed early with no dinner so we could get down to the importance of football ASAP (that stands for As Soon As Possible in case you didn't know).

When the game kicked-off things looked bleak, as the football freak of nature ran one back for a TD (that stands for Touchdown in case you didn't know) in the first 14 seconds of the game. Luckily Manning rifled a TD pass to Reggie Wayne before I had a chance to kick the chair out from under my feet. My wife untied the rope from the rafters and I got down in time to watch D.Rhodes rumble, bumble, and stumble for massive yardage. Luckily Peyton taught him everything he knows.

That's when the party really started to hop! We decided to listen to the game through the surround system so we could take the party to the streets without missing a minute of the action. My neighbor only called the cops once but that wasn't for the noise. I guess some people don't appreciate roman candles rocketing off of their dining room windows.

The dog got painted all red by the end of the game but the party wouldn't stop for another hour. It would have gone all night but we ran out of rubbing alcohol and we were only able to set fire to my front lawn. I had hoped it would start a chain reaction of grass-fires as a tribute to the greatness of Peyton Manning but the local fire-department was such a buzz-kill.

Anyway, I think we can all agree that the most deserving team won the game. Feel free to blogment with your own Super Bowl celebration story!

Love to football!

My Top 3 Songs of All Time

A final throw-back article from the old DUI.com. A little look back into the nostaglia of a young man's life and how music played its part.

1. You Shook Me All Night Long
AC/DC

There is a time in every young mans life when the exhilaration of freedom is bestowed upon him. A day where nothing in the world matters more than the independence one feels when the officer of the state awards him the single most important document in the history of civilized society: the drivers license. Everyone has their own special memory of that time in their life. Mine is inextricably intertwined with the greatest AC/DC song of all time. There are few things that capture the youthful exuberance of being sixteen and behind the wheel of your first car. Flying down the highway, doing twice the legal speed limit, with the windows down, and the radio up, listening to your favorite song. The song that made being behind the wheel more than just a drive. For me that song was You Shook Me All Night Long. Between the sledgehammer poetry of the lyrics and the sheer artistry of the electric guitar, nobody can ever come close to capturing the raw energy of AC/DC’s greatest hit. The notable predictability of the drums is even forgiven when listening to this all time great. Every man has felt the thrill that only his favorite driving song has to offer. Every man longs to capture the spirit of that moment again. All I have to do is pull out the Who Made Who album and hit track number two.


2. What It Takes
Aerosmith

When ranking the greatest songs of all time it is inevitable that I return to my high school years in the search. There is no other time when music matters more. It ranks at the very top of every man’s list along with cars, women, and sports. Okay, so these things remain pretty important throughout a man’s life but never again is so much time dedicated to these four endeavors. How many times did I spend with the guys cruising around town after the football game looking for that elusive girl in the mustang convertible on a Friday night? Far too many to remember. The score of the game, the name of the girl, the make of my best friends car all escape me now. But I do remember the songs. The songs that we listened to over and over again are the ones that stick. The songs that, to this day, I stop whatever I’m doing and sing along at the top of my lungs. There are few albums that have received as much play on my stereo as Aerosmith’s Pump album and the best song on the album is What It Takes. It is a powerful ballad that showcases the talents of the entire band. The pitched singing of Steven Tyler, the confidence of Joe Perry, all are at their best in this all time classic. It captures the spirit of angst in a relationship gone awry. It speaks to the very hart of unrequited love and epitomizes the best of rock and roll. So next time as you flip through the CD racks and all you can remember from the late 80’s is bad hair band metal. I encourage you to pick up a copy of Aerosmith’s song What It Takes and reintroduce yourself to the best that rock and roll has to offer.

3. Ants Marching
Dave Mathews Band

Everyone has a story about being a fan of a band’s music before that band hit the big time. Most of those people are lying through their teeth. There are very few who can claim that they listened to The Dave Mathews Band when they were playing college campuses across the east coast. Unfortunately I am not one of those lucky few. Fortunately, a good friend of mine was and he put me on to The Dave Mathews Band during the summer after our first year in college. So I am proud to say that I was on the cusp of The Dave Mathews Band mega fan base. I was lucky enough to see them live at a “standing room only” concert in Dallas, Texas. It was their first major tour for their album Under the Table and Dreaming. They performed my favorite song that night, Ants Marching. It had been revised from my first hearing of it that summer prior to the concert. My friend owned the hard to find Remember Two Things album. Back then you were lucky to find Dave Mathews on the shelves at all. Hunting for the original version of Ants Marching was for me the Holy Grail of song searches. I eventually found the album in a Los Angeles record store the following summer, a few months before the album could be found in every Wal-Mart across the country. Ants Marching from Remember Two Things was and still is worth going half way across the United States to find. The Dave Mathews Band is the modern day bard, commenting on society through a masterful performance by every player. Carter Beauford’s performance is a kaleidoscope of dizzying percussion. Leroi Moore handles the Saxophone with smooth style only matched on the streets of New Orleans. Stefan Lessard hammers away on the bass like the big band musicians of the twenties did on the cello. If you haven’t seen the violin played like an electric guitar than you haven’t seen the talent that is Boyd Tinsley. Last but not least the guitar and vocal talents of Dave Mathews himself round out the excellence and uniqueness of their single best song. If you haven’t heard Ants Marching from Remember Two Things then you haven’t heard Ants Marching.