Nothing says "Christmas" like Nefarious Monkeys!

Going through some old files and found some funny correspondence between friends. Here is a great Christmas card from my old friend, Braveheart. My friend now practices psychiatric medicine in Austin, TX. You can see the beginnings of his twisted mind back when we were just college kids.

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Cyber D

If I had but one wish this holiday season, it would be for an unholy army of robot monkeys to do my nefarious bidding. If I had but two wishes, I'd either go for more monkeys or more wishes. But if I got more wishes, a wish for you two to have a wonderful holiday season together with each other and those you love would be right on up there with some D-Line help for the Cowboys.


Merry Christmas!
Braveheart

Fantasy Football is here again!

It's an end of an era. I've been my fantasy football league's commissioner for the last 7 years. I've hung up my big boy pants and have folded my league. But some friends are starting up a new league and I'm going to just be your average Joe team owner. In fact I'm going to do two different leagues. Both are on ESPN.com. In one league my team is going to be the Sidekicks. In the other I plan to dust off my old team name... The Mystery Machine. The website needs to grab photos from an Internet site so here are the pics I think I am going to use for now. I'll probably change it up for fun.

Beavers over Trojans!

It was a tale for the ages - The #1 ranked Trojans against the unranked Beavers. Most wouldn't have given those frisky beavers a chance against the mighty power of the Trojan warriors but this is a rivalry that goes back a long time. And like many rivalry games - the statistics get thrown out the window and all bets are off because anything goes!


Yes, the Trojans are a high flying potent offense. They relish penetrating every defensive unit it comes in contact with. This team keeps its eye on the prize and is always looking for the end zone. They score points and lots of them. It would be easy for me to go along with the crowd and predict a victory for the Trojans.

But I also know that the Beaver defense is a tough nut to crack. They are stingy with yardage and teams have to work for every inch of ground they gain. They are merciless in the red zone and will block your attempt to score every time. And while they can play a tough ball game, they also have the talent on their squad to play a coy cat and mouse game, disguising their intentions and then sacking the ball-caller with a trick play.

A classic battle between two titans for the ages. It was a game that could have gone either way. But I had my suspicions that the Beavers will pull it out in the end. I know I preferred the Beavers over the Trojans. How about you?

Simply Amazing!

The results of this play have not been altered through computer graphics. It's one of the most amazing series of laterals you'll ever see. I can't give kudos to the man who edited this thing together, man must he be an annoying douche bag. But it's worth watching!

Playoffs!?!?!

It was a rough weekend of football. I was so excited going into it because I was determined to watch all four playoff games... and I did! From that standpoint it was glorious by any measure. But the results were less then desirable. Things started off well with the Sea-Bags losing to The Pack on the literal "Frozen Tundra of Lambeau Field!!!" The best part about this game was watching these professionals fight, scratch, slide, and generally duke it out in a driving blizzard. What a great game. Little did I know that the venerable Favre heading for the NFC championship game would have so much more meaning by weekends end. Unfortunately the other three games didn't go quite as well.


As predicted that unstoppable juggernaut that is the New England Patriots proved once again that if you are the upstart Jaguars and you make stupid mistakes and throw costly interceptions, Bill Belichick will fuck you in the ass like nobodies business. Brady managed to still play with perfect hair and not impregnate any more super-models during the game. Randy Moss managed to play with vomit inducing perfection. And Coach Bill continued to be a real charmer. With this Jacksonville loss it meant that the Sunday game between the Chargers and Colts was all the more important.


In my opinion the Colts are the better matched team to beat the Patriots so I was cheering on the illustrious Peyton Manning and his noble soldiers of fortune. Too bad they played with so little urgency that an injury riddled San Diego had no trouble keeping and holding their second-half lead. Never in my life would I award a game ball to a punter until Sunday. That son of a bitch is a stud. Even when the Colts defense did their job that punter managed to put the Colts offense in bad situations ever time! It is now the whiny ass of LaDanian Tomlinson up against Pretty Boy Brady.


To cap off a really shit-pile weekend of football the Cowboys and Tony Romo coughed up a giant turd of a loss to the underdog Giants. Wade Phillips said to the media in the post game press conference that the better team lost and that we should be happy with a 13-3 season. Hmmmmmm.... I may be a football idiot but doesn't the win define the better team? Doesn't falling short of potential deserve feelings of disappointment? The Cowboys have no excuse and I am now officially putting Wade Phillips on my "you better watch the hell out" list. I think everyone here understands what that means!


So it comes down to these championship games. I'm no too pleased with the teams in the AFC and I'm not impressed with the inconsistent play of the Giants so here's to Green Bay and their salty captain. Go Pack Go!

Pig Skin Grab-Bag

As the old year winds to a close and the dawn of a new year begins there are so many things one could take time to ponder. Me? I'll ponder the last vestiges of the 2007 season of the National Football League. From a fantasy perspective it's been another bad year. Well, not all bad. The Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet pulled itself out of complete disaster and made a strong run for a play-off berth. Alas, we came up short. A condition that Q is all too familiar with. I'd like to thank all those that continued to believe in The Buffet and a giant "F-You" to Randy Moss for old times sake.



On the subject of the New England Patriots. It turns out those cheating bastards managed to do what no other team since 1972 has done. I tip my hat to those son's of bitches for not losing a single regular season game. It's funny you know. It's not everyday that you can watch history in the making. You would think that I might cheer on the Patriots, simply to be able to say to my grandchildren that I witnessed perfection at work in 2007. But for some reason I couldn't help but wish for failure upon them. I even stayed up to watch the Giants cough up a turd against them on Saturday night. Perhaps it is the fact that I'm a Colts fan, mind you, not a huge Colts fan but a fan none the less. Perhaps it was because they were caught cheating and I hate cheaters. More likely, it is the fact that Bill Belichick is a complete douche and everyone knows I hate a good douche! Anyway, I've still got three more games of hope to keep me going. That's the beauty of a perfect season. It isn't entirely perfect until you win the Super Bowl. So Go Cowboys!!!!!!!!



Finally, with the play-offs looming, one can't help but think about life without football once again. It happens every year and yet I am still caught unprepared for the long lonely months that lie ahead. The NFL does a decent job of giving you little morsels along the way, but it's really nothing more than a giant tease. The Draft? After round 1 who cares? The NFL pro-bowl? Please! It sucks. The Combine? That's really more for college football lovers and generic sports junkies. No, the best I can hope for is some great off-field antics by some misguided players. Take this last year for example... In some ways, I have Micheal Vick to thank for getting me back into the spirit of football earlier than usual. Don't get me wrong, There's a special place in hell reserved for that bastard, but I have to admit, it was nice to go into the Mr. Gatti's for lunch last summer and already see ESPN analysts talking about the future of the Atlanta Falcons. Good times... good times.



So I guess I'll leave you with these last nuggets of wisdom. Remember it is always better to give than to receive. Gyuss taught me that back in college. Auld Lang Syne is old Scottish for "Old Long Since," and Fuck Randy Moss!

New Quarterback - New Life

So I guess it's no secret that The Q and I have been struggling with the whole fantasy football thing this year. In fact, it's been a real bitch. Our first round pick started off a bust and then suffered a multi-week injury. Our second round pick also started off a bust and only now has begun to show signs of life. Our third round pick started off okay but then suffered a multi-week injury. Our fourth round pick started off decently but has just now suffered a multi-week injury. Add onto that four players on our team suffering SEASON ENDING injuries and you can imagine we've been working the waiver wire pretty hard. I'll also throw in the fact that I failed to draft Randy Moss before Q punches me in the nuts by mentioning it for a twenty-fifth F-ing time!

BUT... last week we won and this week we won. In fact this week we won handsomely. Our new QB, replacing one of our QBs with one of those season ending injuries I mentioned, three for three touchdown passes and for more than 200 yards. We still haven't even seen our 1st string running back play this week and we've already sealed up the win by 10 points. Things are looking up! And with our brand spankin' new Arizona Defense, we are ready to rock. Go Cards!

The First One Always Feels Good

The Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet got its first win of the season. The Q and I made an important change at quarterback and started Jake Delhomme over the hapless Drew Brees. What a douche! Now we just have to decide if we are going to cut the bastard. With a 1-2 record it's just a matter of clawing our way to the top!

A Chance Encounter with The Dick

I was in the campus bookstore with about eight coworkers when I noticed a famous former NFL star browsing the sweatshirts. Now you have to understand, I'm not one of those lucky types that always has a funny story about this famous person I saw at the airport or that famous person I bumped into at the coffee shop. I worked in LA for THREE MONTHS and never even saw a single famous person!

So you can imagine my giddy surprise of seeing another former NFL player after having met Roger Staubach a little over one year ago! This time it was none other than Eric Dickerson. What was so funny was that the four men in my group of coworkers were like moths to a flame. We drifted over in his direction almost immediately while the four ladies in the room were still focusing on the best cut of t-shirt and if the store had it in pink or baby-blue.

Us boys were later chided for paying homage to one of football's greats. I simply replied that my shameless pandering was not for me but for the bragging rights amongst my social circles... of which this blog is one!

So yeah, the encounter itself was awesome. I even managed to make him laugh by suggesting that he needed to put on a uniform and play for his former college team.

Good times... good times.

Football time in the city!

Well the 4th annual MOBFL draft is over and I must say that the Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet has once again crafted a team worthy of pig skin glory! I'm proud to say that the Q and I still reign supreme on draft day. Unfortunately The Tasty Q couldn't make it to the MOBFL draft this year. When I asked him why, he refused to give me a straight answer and only muttered something about an archeologist and a billionaire. Anyway, here is the round by round results of the hard work put forth by our team hence forth referred to as the SDLB.

Round 1 - This was a no brainer. We had the second pick in the draft and while we toyed with the idea of trading up for the number one pick, we decided to not sacrifice anything that wasn't necessary. As part owner and Q's proxy, I drafted Steven Jackson, Running Back extraordinaire. He will put up some monster numbers and with points per reception now being added to the scoring system, we have the secret weapon that others will envy.

Round 2 - Twenty picks had gone by and all of the stud Running Backs were gone. The top flight Quarterback was taken early in Round 1 and the run on QBs had begun. But the choice wasn't easy. After this next pick, a single owner would have the benefit of picking twice before I could pick again in Round 3. Should I draft the next best QB on the board or should I grab the best RB still available? I decided that value at RB was beginning to get murky but there was still a clear choice on the best QB available. I drafted Drew Brees feeling that he was next in line to those that went before him, such as Palmer, Manning, and Brady.

Round 3 - My choice was the correct one as the before mentioned owner drafted the touchdown machine: Marion Barber as well as Donovan McNabb. Barber's a nice pick but others can perform equally. On the other hand, the QB tier drops after Brees and McNabb is no Brees. I feel that had I waited on Brees he would not have been there. Now I look for the best clear RB starter available and it is Brandon Jacobs of the NYG.

Round 4 - Copious amounts of top flight wide outs go in this round and I am not surprised that few are left. There is still one undeniable stud and I take Javon Walker and pray that his QB doesn't meltdown.

Round 5 - Running Backs are looking terrible now so I draft another unequivocal starter and am thankful that what may be left are all teams that run RB's by committee. I take Caddilac and don't look back.

Round 6 - With only one wide out on my team it's clear where I need to go next and due to my dedication in picking quality RBs I'm getting nervous. Time to look for a #1 WR on a winning team. Darrell Jackson was already taken but he's now in San Fran. His Seattle replacement is available and I take Deion Branch.

Round 7 - We had some piss poor running last year and I'm determined to pull out all the stops. With some really great RB's secured I feel it is still not enough. I see one unequivocal starter still available and while he plays for the crappy Oakland Raiders, he's showed brilliance in the past. I draft LaMont Jordan and hope for a little "return to glory" action.

Round 8 - I can't believe a kicker hasn't been drafted yet. Most people discount their value but someone always beats me to the best one. Not this year. I break the kicker seal and draft Adam Vinatieri.

Round 9 - With my RB core filled out and a good stable of WR locked up I return my attention to QB. Brees is a young stud who should play well but a sold back-up is always good. Better yet, how about another super-power young QB. I draft Jake Delhomme and am surprised he is still available.

Round 10 - I'm making a run on WR's now and I see another go-to guy in Jacksonville. I draft Matt Jones

Round 11 - Things are still looking bleak in Wide Receiver territory and the RB situation is even worse. So I snag a possible emerging star and tandem wide out to my Drew Brees in Devery Henderson, the #2 WR in New Orleans.

Round 12 - I look back and I am pleased with my work. The last time I felt such calm and lack of hurriedness was when I took my team to the fantasy Superbowl. Could this year see more of the same? With a back-up kicker like Olindo Mare, I can't imagine any other outcome.

Round 13 - I never draft a defense this early but things feel pretty good amongst my other positions and a solid Defense is still available. I draft the Jags.

Round 14 - With arguably one of the best RB cores in this draft, I have flexibility to take a risk. I draft A. Peterson from Chicago as a back-up RB with a chance at greatness.

Round 15 - Is usually garbage time. But there is actually still a go-to WR for his team available. Granted, it's the Raiders (and I never thought I would draft two Raiders) but he's a number one and I'm not sacrificing much value taking him as my last pick. Welcome to the SDLB, Jerry Porter.

That's it. You read it here first. Now only fortune and glory remain to be achieved!

P.S. I don't want to hear shit about the spelling of names. I don't give a hairy rats ass.

Lil' Higgins and The Big Tuna

It was late last night and we were cleaning up around the house. We had just finished dinner with a co-worker and put the toddler to bed. Mrs. Cyber was cleaning the kitchen and I was walking around the house with a wide awake baby in my arms. Being too tired to watch TV and too bored to sit on my ass, I started doing what I so affectionately call "mental drifting." It was in that moment, as I looked down at the limp sack of baby in my arms, that I came to the distinct realization that my son and Bill Parcells have so much in common.



Case in Point:

1) They both look exactly the same in a t-shirt and shorts.

2) They both are soft and "pudgy."

3) They both cry uncontrollably when they don't get what they want.

4) They both crap their pants whenever they feel like it.

5) They both have a solid mastery of a 3-4 defense.

6) They both smell better with baby-powder.

7) They both require 24-hour attention or else they may choke on small toys.

Drew is Back...

...with a special editorial. If you like the ramblings of the burger-loving gunslinger that was wrongfully jerked from his starting position, then check out one of his recent articles. He talks about the retirement of Bill Parcels.

Rock and Roll All Night

What a year of the football. My favorite team recently announced an exciting new minority head coach, my favorite quarterback made it to the Super Bowl and single-handidly won the game and then deservedly was anointed the mantel of MVP, placing him amongst the greats of football-all-time. Move over Uncle Rico, there's a new sheriff in town!

It was happy-fun-time a the cyber-home last night. I had a few family members over for a laid back get-together. Little did we know we would rock the house down! We sent the kid to bed early with no dinner so we could get down to the importance of football ASAP (that stands for As Soon As Possible in case you didn't know).

When the game kicked-off things looked bleak, as the football freak of nature ran one back for a TD (that stands for Touchdown in case you didn't know) in the first 14 seconds of the game. Luckily Manning rifled a TD pass to Reggie Wayne before I had a chance to kick the chair out from under my feet. My wife untied the rope from the rafters and I got down in time to watch D.Rhodes rumble, bumble, and stumble for massive yardage. Luckily Peyton taught him everything he knows.

That's when the party really started to hop! We decided to listen to the game through the surround system so we could take the party to the streets without missing a minute of the action. My neighbor only called the cops once but that wasn't for the noise. I guess some people don't appreciate roman candles rocketing off of their dining room windows.

The dog got painted all red by the end of the game but the party wouldn't stop for another hour. It would have gone all night but we ran out of rubbing alcohol and we were only able to set fire to my front lawn. I had hoped it would start a chain reaction of grass-fires as a tribute to the greatness of Peyton Manning but the local fire-department was such a buzz-kill.

Anyway, I think we can all agree that the most deserving team won the game. Feel free to blogment with your own Super Bowl celebration story!

Love to football!

Cha-Ching!

I'm a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. I've been one for many years. But in the last 5-7 years, I've acquired both an NFL regulation football and Manning jersey signed by the future hall of famer himself, Peyton Manning. Since that time, I have quietly (or not so quietly) wished this quarterbacking prodigy well on his road to greatness. If for no other reason than to have the value of my two sports collectibles go up! Over the course of the last several seasons Peyton has always managed to come up short and I have felt sorry for this multi-millionaire. Once again the football savant made his way to the AFC Championship game and once again it appeared that he might just choke. I found myself again cheering my heart out for the Indianapolis Colts, only this time, I realized I was cheering for the hopes of other individuals as well. Tony Dungy, Marvin Harrison... in general the entire Colts franchise. Could it be that I have unwittingly become a Colts fan? Perhaps. At the end of the game, when the Colts finally won the day, I was a happy football fan, and resigned in what might be now my second favorite team. Only the strangest thing happened at that very moment. As I was watching Peyton upon the championship podium, a thought ran through my head...

"I wonder how much my jersey is worth now."

So on the eve of Peyton's first Super Bowl appearance I say, "Go Manning and Go Colts!"

Football is over

For me the football season has come to an end. My fantasy hopes died with a tie game. A tie game. Suck. I'd almost rather lose. I'd like to appologize to America for the disappointment that was the Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet. The team ownership will be doing a complete assessment of the franchise fom top to bottom across all facets of the organization and we will report in the off-season our findings. Well, One can only look toward the future now and the hope that one day I might be lucky enough to draft LT or Peyton Manning. Who knows, perhaps next year I will be the special franchise that manges to get a pick in the top 5 to secure that special player that makes losing teams into winning ones. Only time will tell. I wish those deserving owners the best of luck in their fantasy play-offs.

Cyber D, Out!

Victory!

Victory is ours! The Q and I finally had a solid win this week for our fantasy football team. For those of you that don't know the Q and I combined forces to form the greatest rock and roll fantasy football franchise that ever rocked this side of the Mississippi River! Unfortuantely the gods of rock and fantasy football have not been smiling upon our humble franchise. We have eeked out two wins in embarassing fashion and have been dragging the bottom of the league standings. However, we both knew we had a great team. They have just been late bloomers. With a few free agent acquisitions and some of our drafted players finally coming on strong we decimated the division leader 59-52 (so far) and we have 3 more players yet to play. That should equate to at least a 69-52 victory!

I think the world will look back on this week of October in 2006 and remember that this was the momment that the Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet finally made its run for the play-offs!

I need answers!

I've been playing fantasy football for almost ten years. The last couple have been in a new league with largely rookie ownership. In both years I struggled and made the play-offs one of those two years. This year I combined forces with The Q... who made it to the Super Bowl last year in the league. This year we will have started 0-3. On paper our team isn't bad. It's solid. But our offensive production really sucks right now. I know we can get it together but we basically have no consistency. Q has been great about not laying all of this at my feet, considering the fact that I drafted the team while he was out of town... but I really can't help but think our draft is part of the problem.

I'll be honest with the blogging world when I say that ever since we did this keeper system, I have been thrown for a loop! I can't seam to get my footing year in and year out with each draft and I am very much looking forward to a clean slate in 2007. Having said that, I'm still at a loss for why we suck this year. The Q and I are good judges of talent. Perhaps it is that same phenomena when four family members go to the movies and can't decide what they want to see.

Observe:

Mom - Wants to see the Oscar nominated love story but will settle for the tongue and cheek comedy.

Dad - Wants to see the high-powered action film of the summer but will settle for the tongue and cheek comedy.

Son - Wants to see the big-budget comic book film but will settle for the tongue and cheek comedy.

Daughter - Wants to see the star-studded romantic comedy but will settle for the tongue and cheek comedy.

Arguably in every case, each member of the family wants to see a pretty good movie and arguably every member of the family might enjoy each film better than the lame tongue and cheek comedy but it happens to be 2nd on all their lists based on personal preference. Consequently the family chooses the lowest common denominator because they can all agree on this... and in the end nobody is happy.

So how does this relate to my team with Q? I know I'm holding Q back in some ways and he has respectfully consulted my opinion in every decision. Likewise, I'm sure some ideas have crossed my mind that I have refrained from suggesting because I know Q might be against it. The result is two championship level styles getting watered down in order to gel with the each other. That is not to say that I am not enjoying this partnership. It is proving to be a great working relationship. But I tell you right now that neither Q nor I are happy with our current record.

What I think is really at play here is just some seriously bad luck. But with another couple of losses I'll start to question that.

To the Q, I say we need to do something drastic. We need to mix it up. I don't know what that is but I'm sure we can come up with something.

Damn, I hate to lose.

It's not an invitation to dinner but it's more than most people get!

Today was probably my last major event with my current employer. I would say that for the most part I went out with a whimper. I wasn't in charge or even responsible for much of anything so I showed up on-time and stood around holding up a wall. This is much different than what I am normally accustomed to doing - that being working the room and meeting strangers so I can ask them for money. It was actually kind of nice to be as anti-social as I wanted to be without any expectations.

The speaker was quite a bore, and the program was pretty hap-hazard so it made me feel pretty good about the fact that even though my ex-boss expected perfection, she will continue to be disappointed by the people that she hires since (like me) we are all only human!

But there was one very special moment. Had I been a little more "on the ball" I might have gotten more. Maybe a conversation. Having received only a hand-shake and the casual comment of "hi," I was still extremely satisfied, because I got to shake the hand or Roger Staubach! Two and a half years with my organization and finally the man comes to one of our events. He's been invited to absolutely everything we do and he finally came. And I got to shake his hand. This is a Three time Super Bowl Champion, Quarterback of the Dallas Cowboys Football Franchise from 1969 to 1979, and all around person of prominence. It's not everyday that one gets the brief brush with fame (and believe me - mine was brief), but it's more than most people get, so I'm not ashamed to flaunt it. Woo-Hoo!

Why I know Emmitt Smith can dance and why I am not gay for knowing it.

So I have to make a confession. I've been struggling with this for a long time, but I feel the world needs to know that I do - in fact - watch Dancing with the Stars on ABC. Okay. I've admitted it. Let's get the cut-downs in early. I can take it. Let the good times role! Are you finished? Thank you.

Now that I once again have your undivided attention I shall explain why I choose to watch this show. You might say to yourself... his wife makes him watch it. I could use that excuse but I'll not hide behind those lies. Then why spend time watching a dance competition? Watching ballroom dancing is, without a doubt, exceedingly gay! I must protest greatly! Observe the following points.

1) It's a competition: Men love competitive activities. The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. Deep down if you know the rules most men enjoy any kind of competition ranging from tic-tac-toe to the NFL.

2) The NFL: Did you know Emmitt Smith is one of the contestants? In addition to Emmitt there is a political pundit. Dude, men are into politics! Did you know that the lead from Clash of the Titans movie is in the competition? What man doesn't love Clash of the Titans? And Springer... all men enjoy a good chick fight on Springer. Still not convinced?

3) Eye-Candy: There are really great looking chicks on this show. Of course I'm watching for the talented performances but a lesser man might find the shimmering female form to be quite appealing.

So having said all that, I will tell you that Emmitt Smith can dance. The dude is good. You should check it out.

Peace out.

Hope Springs Eternal

The Men of Baker Fantasy Football League (or MOBFL) Draft has officially concluded for 2006. Good times were had by all and everyone, save The Gulf Coast Brigands, enters this NFL season with prospects high. While this weekend was not the best for me in terms of fantasy football focus, I do believe the Sports Donkey Lollipop Buffet (or SDLB) has a strong team.

Round 1 - In a very unexpected move I made a trade with the new owner who held the 1st pick in the draft. Knowing he is a Redskins apologist, I offered him the SDLB keeper player Clinton Portis, in exchange for him drafting Rudi Johnson and trading him to me. A player that I would have never been able to draft at the end of the first round. In making this trade the Fat Hogs and the SDLB swapped second round picks.

Round 2 - At the end of the 2nd round the "Brain Trust" of the SDLB decided to draft Reggie Bush if he was available. If not, we were to grab the best WR on the board. Reggie Bush was drafted in the first round! Major surprise. So with Holt, Harrison, and Moss all taken I drafted Roy Williams - super stud out of Detroit.

Round 3 - Perhaps the most crucial position in the draft and I go and cough up an egg! With Barber, Portis, Johnson, James, Alexander, Tomlinson, Parker, Foster, Jones, Williams, Jackson, and Droughns all gone I panic and take Julius Jones. This is perhaps my most lamented decision of the entire draft, but we move on.

Round 4 - With the SDLB (having kept Terrell Owens and secured Roy Williams, and now two solid starting backs, I go for the best QB on the board. With Manning, Manning, McNabb, Brady, Bulger, Rothlesburger, Delhome, and Culpepper gone I snag the great white hope, Trent Green. The offense may not be as high-flying but he has a great arm and some great O-weapons.

Round 5 - Running backs are now looking bleak with the only thing left being, backs with injury risk, rookies, and backs on a team that choose to execute a running-back by committee concept. I go for Joseph Addai. Possibly the next great runner behind the line with Peyton Manning. A rookie, yes but a promising one. This feels like my genius rookie pick of Fred Taylor eight years ago.

Round 6 - Running Backs aren't looking any better and you need 4 on a team. Chris Brown is still a starter so we take him and are grateful.

Round 7 - With two stud Wideouts it isn't too much of a concern who the number 3 is on the SDLB, but Reggie Brown is the go-to guy for McNabb. He'll get his share of TDs.

Round 8 - Let go ahead and lock up the last Wideout, so we can worry about something else. Lee Evans is the number one wide receiver for Buffalo and as the number 4 wide receiver for the SDLB, that is a pretty deep group!

Round 9 - Trent Green aint no spring chicken and injuries can happen. The young QBs with promise are all gone, but there are plenty of "journeymen" looking to cash in on a good situation. How about the offensive genius of Mike Martz and the beautiful hands of Roy Williams? John Kitna becomes the SDLB number 2 QB.

Round 10 - With Rudi, Julius, Addai, and Chris Brown as the 4 RBs, there are still concerns of productivity. The number 3 back in Green Bay is still available and the only back in GB that will not be suffering from injury this season. Samkon Gado because the number 5 RB on the SDLB.

Round 11 & 12 - The SDLB prefers to draft kickers before the "run" begins. We were one round too late. But managed to snag Jason Elam and Jeff Reed. Just after Viniaterri, Feely, Graham, and Akers were taken. Bad news: Elam and Reed share a bye week so a trade will be required before week 4. Serves me right for not paying attention, but at pick 11 out of 12 in a serpentine draft, you don't get much time between picks to think about the next one.

Round 13 - It's garbage time and the SDLB wants to load up with as many backs as possible. How about an ageless goal-line vulture, adored by his head coach? Sounds good. Welcome back Mike Alstot. I have missed you so very much.

Round 14 - I never draft a defense early and I never will. As evidenced by this great defense still sitting out here at the end of the draft. Indianapolis was a monster last year and Tony Dungy will only improve this unit in 2006.

Round 15 - As a keeper pick on the 15th round Terrell Owens only comes with upside.

So good luck to all you slouches in other leagues and be lucky that you do not fall under the boot of the might SDLB in the MOBFL.